Tonight I let go of something thats been haunting me for two years. A choice I had made that took the love of Christ’s life out of me and let my spirit embrace things that have only giving me grief. I denied myself and robed myself of a God who walked with me all through my youth. Simply by letting a man into my life and heart who had no right to be there. He took this girls innocence and recked it. But tonight is the first time I’ve admitted it. I have never shed more tears of humility, sorrow, and an overwhelming feeling of true forgiveness then I did tonight.
A person doesn’t change over night and if they do, before beating on them for it, consider the possibility in your mind that something may have happened to them, that completely recked their world and robed them of something precious, their worth.
Look at them through the eyes of Christ. “He straightened up and said, “The sinless one among you, go first: Throw the stone. “….Hearing that, they walked away, one after another, beginning with the oldest. The woman was left alone. Jesus stood up and spoke to her. “Woman, where are they? Does no one condemn you?” No one, Master.” “Neither do I,””
Heres an other thought, funny how all through out scripture the people that play some of the biggest rolls in the line of Christ, have all had to taste hurt, darkness, and sin. Jacob, a deceiver and robber. Was the Father of Israel. Rehab, a prostitute. Became mother in the line of king David. David, a man after God’s own heart, but guilty of murder, Idolatry, just to name of few. But he found great favor in the eyes of God.
It was not their sins, but their repentance and humility that won them favor in the eyes of the Holy One.
There are many wounds and hurts that this girl here has faced and still has to face, some are healed, others have pus and then there are the ones that bleed out blood.
But tonight I prayed from the depth of my heart and soul that,
“I no longer wanted to fight this fight. God I pushed you out and away. And chased a path that has left me broken. Opened my spirit to spirits that have haunted my dreams and thoughts. But tonight you have washed over me with your pure Holy Spirit burning all that wickedness. And I embrace You! I open my life and heart completely to Your work. And to be used by God”.
I read this in my devotional a couple days ago and put it in my journal because it struck a cord in my heart. But I didn’t know how to make these desires truly apart of who I am, until tonight.
“The world doesn’t need super men or women, but super – natural people. People who will turn the self out of their lives and let Divine Power work through them. Let inspiration take the place of aspiration. Seek to grow spiritually, rather than to acquire fame and riches. Our cheif ambition should be to be used by God. The Divine Force is sufficient for all the Spiritual work in the world. God only needs the instruments for His use. His instruments can remake the world.”
There is a lot more to this story, but for now thats all I’m going to share.
