These past two and half months in Africa I have been struggling with trust.
The year leading up to departing I was consistently reflecting upon the next season after the Race: University.
I weighed different programs, thoughts of moving away for school and researched different universities. I came to the conclusion to pursue nursing.
As departure drew nearer for India I had to get High School transcripts ready for Dad to send to Universities on my behalf while I was away.
Now, fast forward to month six of the Race; Botswana. I am now receiving emails from Dad that he has sent my application and transcripts away to my desired universities.
I have yet to hear back from them but their anticipated response is weighing on me.
The choice of which school to go to is coursing through my mind. I have been doing flips in my thoughts to what is the right decision.
As I twirl and swirl, worry begins to set in. Things begin to magnify. Example:
“Oh my goodness, I have never moved out before.
How do I do that?”
“What about student loans? How do I apply for them?”
“What about working and going to school? Is that possible with a full course load? Will working and studying compromise my grades?”
As I hop from one worry to the next I begin to notice I am loosing sight of what trusting in the Lord is.
So one day in Botswana I sat down and quietted myself. I said “Lord calm my mind to see you.”
“What is your will?”
And simply the word “Trust” came to mind.
With this word I begin to look up verses and stories in the Bible that highlight trust. Here are a few:
Joshua 1:9
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”
Psalm 9:10
“Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, LORD, have never forsaken those who seek you.”
Psalm 56:3
“When I am afraid, I will trust in you.”
Proverbs 3:5-6
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Daniel 6:23
“The king was overjoyed and gave orders to lift Daniel out of the den. And when Daniel was lifted from the den, no wound was found on him, because he had trusted in his God.”
Romans 15:13
“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”
As home becomes nearer in sight, my prayer is that what ever the outcome might be , that I continue to fix my eyes on the Lord. That He will inevitably show me the right door to walk through.
God Bless,
Clare
