I have survived my first full week in Thailand, everybody! WHOOP WHOOP! Here’s a look into what this first week was like.
We arrived to our hostel in Chiang Mai on a Wednesday night and spent the following four days in rest, exploration, and learning about the culture. We wandered in the the local markets, with delicious foods being our number one priority (pad thai…pad see ew…Thai tea…MM MM MM). We went to a Buddhist temple and spoke with the monks there. We gathered many times as a squad to worship and pray over our hostel, our squad, and this city. May I just say, praising the Lord in complete freedom, raising hands and dancing, singing and yelling at the top of my lungs… it’s my new favorite thing. The clarity of His presence and voice as He speaks right into every problem, every fear, every little thing I’m facing… it brings indescribable fulfillment. It’s certainly what I was made for, and really, what we all were. And I hope you all get to experience this deep fulfillment that comes from calling out to the Lord and lifting Him high, because it absolutely and completely changes everything.
Anyways, throughout those first four days, I made attempts to build relationships with some of the Thai people I met, but I was feeling extremely hesitant to point the conversations to Jesus. I wanted to SO badly – it’s what I came here to do! I want everyone I meet to know that they no longer have to live in the pain and confusion and exhaustion and stress of the world; that they have access to an unexplainable joy, an unconditional love, a life-fulfilling purpose in Jesus Christ. After experiencing the reality of it myself, my biggest desire is for other people to enjoy it too. But for some reason, I was shying away from sharing it. And I was extremely angry at myself about that.
So, I went up to the rooftop of our hostel, and as I looked over the city, I prayed. I asked, in the name of Jesus, for Him to cast out all of my fear and all of my hesitation. As I spoke with Him, He answered. But first, He reminded me that my value doesn’t come from what I do for Him. It is not determined by my performance, or my faith, or my courage. It is completely and solely determined by His love for me. He loves me exactly as I am, broken and flawed. He has forgiven and redeemed all of my past, present, and future failures. He sacrificed His life for me, so that I may be set free from the expectations of perfection, and the guilt of never living up. I have a hard time understanding and accepting this love sometimes, but He that night He made it clear – I’m not meant to carry the weight of the world.
Since then, the Lord has done incredible things. The Spirit has led me fearlessly into so many incredible conversations. I became close friends with a girl at my ministry, and I got to share how the Lord has changed my life. I shared about my passion for Him, and she shared about her passion for K-pop (lol). We added eachother on Facebook, and we’re going to go get tea sometime soon!
I also went with some friends to the market a couple different times with the intent of sharing Jesus. One time, a man walked right up to us and started conversation. We thought, “well…that was easy!” We got to know him, and we ended up praying over His shop, and telling Him about the power of prayer. He said He would test it out sometime, and he even hinted at embracing a new faith, one in Christ! Other times, I would start conversations with people, walk away, and suddenly find myself chasing back after them, asking if I could pray over them – a crazy act of boldness that can ONLY be explained by God. I also, without second guessing it, just started asking people what they believed in. It’s so much less scary and awkward then I always made it out to be! There was a surprising amount of times they would answer that they were Christian – which was such a sweet gift from the Lord, reminding me that He has already been moving powerfully in this place, and I am not alone here! There were also times they answered that they were Buddhist, and they still allowed me to pray for them (even when they didn’t speak English, which was so cool). One time, my friend and I had a long, gospel conversation with the sweet Buddhist woman who did our laundry. She expressed interest in what we were saying about Jesus taking away our shame, and offering a salvation that we don’t have to earn. And most recently, I became friends with a Christian from Singapore, and got to share a bit about the power and freedom of Jesus with his two Muslim friends.
All the glory to Him, because I am fully confident that none of these gospel moments would’ve occurred if they weren’t His doing. He answered my plea for courage, in ways far better than I imagined! It’s crazy that He can move so powerfully through a person like me, who by myself am so meek and afraid. I intend to keep partnering with Him as I develop all of the new friendships He gave me this week, and continue sharing Him with people every chance I get.
Furthermore, the Lord also answered another big prayer! He assigned my team (who you can learn about on the lower left side of this page) to serve an incredible ministry for the next two months here in Thailand. We will be working with the Wildflower Home, a shelter where pregnant women and mothers can seek empowerment, learning, and health. Here’s a link if you want to learn more about it: http://www.wildflowerhome.org/home.html This Monday was the start of our first week volunteering with them. I never knew serving the Lord could like like pulling weeds, smashing mushroom bags into a giant dumpster of compost, or spreading gravel on a driveway. But now I know the Lord can use even the most mundane acts of service to further His kingdom. I might never understand or witness the fruit of them, but they are still so very valuable. OH also, I got to play with the children for a day, and it was the most joyful thing. I LOVE KIDS AHKLDFJLDK.
So that’s where I am! I hope you enjoyed the update – if you have any questions, please comment or reach out! We actually have wifi almost all of the time, so I am able to communicate with you guys pretty often 🙂 And as always, I would greatly appreciate your prayers. Please pray for God to move in the lives of each new friend I wrote about, and for Him to continue giving me boldness! Thank you all so much. I miss you guys a lot.
loving you far,
Claire
