Y’all, I’ve seen some funky stuff and I don’t even drug. Let me take you back to Nicaragua for a second, because an event happened there that has changed my life forever.
I have struggled with depression and anxiety for a real long time. Now, I’m not talking about “oh I’m sad and life is hard so I’ll be sad for a little while” depression. I mean real, raw depression. It’s the kind that comes for no reason and stays until it’s gone. I couldn’t control it or send it away except by calling on the Lord, and that would take many minutes of asking God to please save me from my own brain.
When the depression came, it would plague me with many thoughts. The most common one was self-harm. I haven’t touched a blade since 2014, but the amount of times that idea came into my mind was concerning. I’d also think about suicide and evil presences hunting me down, and it’d be enough to leave me paralyzed wherever I was until someone snapped me out of it. I didn’t know how to get free, I didn’t even know that was an option.
When I was in Nicaragua, I walked through one of the hardest weeks of my life- for no logical reason. It was two weeks after my parents came, two weeks after I saw the Lord move my family in more ways than I could even ask for. I saw so much healing and growth, so naturally the enemy tried to take me back. Duding that week I could literally sense the enemy around me. He was standing in front of me in the shower, choking my throat, and even plaguing my mind with gruesome thoughts of him attacking me in the worst ways. Additionally, the enemy began to dig up old memories and wounds that I didn’t even know were there, and it brought me to tears a couple of times. Every time I rebuked him in the name of Jesus, every time he went away, and then every time he’d return with something new. There was so much victory in my family in the weeks before that the enemy was desperate to give me some defeat.
After a week of dealing with all that, I finally came to my team and just broke down. I told them all about what was going on and they prayed over me. It was a beautiful thing, but then I had to go talk to my squad leader.
Ashley and I sat down two days after I talked to my teammates, and I told her everything. I told her all the thoughts in my brain and all the hurt and depression, every single detail was brought to the light. It was scary and at some moments I wanted to hide, but I didn’t. Through that conversation Ashley spoke some wisdom into my life that brought a lot of healing. Then, she prayed over me. Friends, that’s when it happened.
As she prayed, Ashley rebuked my depression and told it to leave in Jesus’s name. In that moment I saw a vision. I saw Ashley and I sitting in our chairs and their was a blinding white light. There were demons surrounding us on all sides, but as Ashley prayed the light pushed them away. I saw them all pushed to the very edge of the property. They were slobbering and gnashing their teeth trying to get in, but all of them were trapped outside.
Then I saw Jesus dragging one demon, it was my depression. I looked at the creature and saw its hate towards me all fester. It gnashed it’s teeth and tried to get away, but Jesus held it tightly. He then brought the creature up to a black hole and threw it down into the depths. Jesus closed the pit and locked it up. He offered me the key, but I refused and insisted that He keep it (Because let’s be honest, a key like that is best left in His hands).
So Jesus took away the key, and in its place He gave me a wedding ring. Once again, He reminded me that I am His bride, and instantly I was wearing a wedding dress. He was wearing a tux, and as He grabbed my arm we walked together into freedom.
Not everyone has a story like mine, I get that, but guys freedom from depression is real. I would have never thought to pray for a god to heal my depression before, but ever since that day the depression has been GONE, I’ve never gone this long without the depression and it’s gone!! God has healed me from my depression. I firmly believe in the power of prayer, and I believe that He can heal you too. Never stop praying, never stop lifting your requests up to God. He can do more than you could ever imagine or hope for. Message me if you have any questions! God is so good!!
~CLS
