I laid down, barely able to think because the swells of nausea were coursing through my stomach like
a surfer rides a wave. I felt the needle go in and thought I was going to puke. I started heaving, Moriah
started praying and the doctor assured me in seconds it would be over. Luckily everything I ate at that
point exploded out of my body seconds later so there was nothing to vomit. My body relaxed when IT
hit me. I shot up, realizing that if I stayed down they’d take me to my room in the ELEVATOR! I couldn’t, I
wouldn’t show weakness. I had to convince them I was strong so I could climb the foreboding stairs.
Nurses, doctors, teammates, and our contact tried to coax me to take the electronic lift but I adamantly
refused. Me, my drugged up self and about 5 other nervous folks crawled up two flights of stairs and
afterwards, I fell into bed and my stay at the Island Hospital began.
The last three mornings, I’ve been hooked up to a drip, getting hydration and antibiotics pumped into
my system as my mighty little frame fought off e. coli—or something like that. The doctor never said for
sure. Apparently when you eat street food on the reg and brush your teeth with "the water", it makes the
diagnosis a little sketch.
The laughter and joy; sleep and hot showers that flowed through Room 222 will be forever some of my
favorite memories on the Race. Never have I felt so taken care of or so loved. My team, my squad and
my Biffle, Moriah, hardly slept as they nursed me back to health. I, on the other hand, slept like I hadn’t
had the privilege in 6 months…Oh wait, I haven’t really slept like that since the States. But truly, I’m in
awe of my community.
I witnessed Jesus hands and feet through the lives of my friends, my brothers, my sisters.
I’m still humbled and speechless by the outpouring of love, encouragement, chocolate, flowers, mentos,
diet coke, gatorades and fiber crackers brought to us. And the many meals that were catered by my
friends since everyone in Penang just stops living during the Chinese New Year. For real, the hospital
was empty and so were the positions that normally make food in the cafeteria and hospital bakery. But
seriously, the quality time spent together has left a smile on my heart that will last forever.
Moriah is quite a jokester and picked up some fake poop on our way through Thailand last month. She
strategically placed it beside my toilet in hopes of getting the nurses and our teammates who were on
their way for a visit. The team picked up on it immediately but two nurses got whiplash from the double
takes made as they left my room. My favorite nurse, the one who loves Jesus, however fell rather hard
for the joke. She saw it and exclaimed:
It’s solid! The poop is solid!
We were dying laughing but the question as to why she didn’t think it odd that poop was sitting beside
the toilet rather than in it definitely ran across my mind. Bless her heart, she had fought this fight with
me and knew my pain so home girl was beyond excited we’d gotten the meds to work. But alas, it was
fake. When she realized the prank, she and the rest of the room got quite a good laugh.
There were so many sweet moments, endearing conversations, jokes about my drugged up state and
random comments and lots of AC flow. I’m sweating typing this, relishing the fact that though the
headache is still raging, I’m no longer attached to a porcelain throne and for that, I’ll shout PRAISE HIM!
The day I left, I asked “How I do check out?” Uh, note to self, you were not at a hotel. It was a hospital.
The “check out” is known to the rest of the world as being discharged.
Before my 3 day getaway, Jesus and I were having some awesome times on the rooftop each morning.
He told me some cool truth that I’m really sinking my teeth into here lately. He said, why do you think
most marriages don’t work? I told Him I didn’t know and He took me on a wild adventure revealing
things that caused me to fall even more in love with Him, left my eyes twinkling and a goofy grin playing
across my lips.
God created this insatiable desire for us to be loved. We want it so bad we do nearly anything to quench
it. We stay in rotten relationships, dive into booze and drugs or get super bitter in order to appease,
satisfy or ignore the raging inside of us. When we use people to try to fill the need rather than accept
the immeasurable gift of God’s love, we flat out fail. I know I’m totally a saint in Jesus’ eyes but I’m also
100000% human over here on planet earth so it’s a daily surrender that I lay at His feet. And I plan to
keep on doing it until it becomes engrained in my DNA that this love, these affections can’t be measured
my measly human standards. The Creator of the universe placed this crazy awesome desire in me and
the only way to get filled is to let Him do the filling. All day err day. Every moment of every minute.
Otherwise it’s like setting your peeps up for failure. Expectations rear their feisty little heads, then the
beasts aren’t met because, hey, we’re human and we’re incapable of loving like The King of All Mankind
and then the cycle of disappointment, discouragement and whatever else creeps in.
My hope, my utmost desire is to have eyes for my Savior only. I want Him alone to have the keys to the
love tank and yippee that He fills it to overflowing daily! I want my thoughts dwelling on the fact that
His love is inescapable. It’s everlasting and it’s a whirlpool that I desperately need and full of incredible
grace that I absolutely want to swim around in.
So let’s jump.
Pencil dive, cannon ball or belly flop but let’s go. Jump into the ocean. It’s deeper, vaster and far more
amazing than anything we can possibly conceive. Let’s race into His presence humbly but boldly. C’mon
shout with me love declarations to our Handsome Prince! Shoot, He’s the Creator of all this love stuff, so
let’s bask in His glory and revel in His handiwork. Woo to the freakin hoo!
Happy Valentine’s Day from Malaysia!
