*I'm forewarning my coping skills were sub par at best during this team building exercise*
Picture about 40 women standing in dense foliage, already glistening because girls dont sweat (yeahh right) as the leaders gave us our scenario…
Our plane crashed and injuries occurred. We must get over the mountain before it's too late- oh and don't forget quite a few teammates now have disabilities… Mute, blind, unconscious, etc. But don't worry, Christin. You are totally able bodied- so start helping the injured.
I looked bewildered- as if I'd never been to a plane crash site before- when I spotted Jen. Precious Jen. Poor girl was legless (remember we're make believing here…)
My friend Liz is about 4"11 and I am 5'3ish on a tall day. Together, we scooped Jen up and started hiking the mountain. We alternated Jen on our backs because it was easier to maneuver the terrain. The sweat made carrying her a little tricky since it makes everything slippery. I'm not proud of this next part, but it's the truth.
My compassion flew out the window.
I thwacked, smacked and dragged that poor girl all the way up the mountain. I was getting from point A to B, ASAP and didn't have an ounce of sweetness in me to make sure she arrived in one piece. I was not a bowl full of fun that afternoon as I grunted, groaned and moaned up this tremendous incline.
I'm sure every missionary from here to Africa is clapping their hands in anticipation knowing I'm coming to love on their little orphan children…I'm definitely a work in compassion progress!
Well, since then…we've started team feedback- yipee! My compassion issues have been exposed and confessed and I apologized to my dear friend, Jen!
I didn't embrace the situation- I just wanted to get it over with. I wasnt jumping for joy or doing backflips to make sure my teammates were ok. Honestly, I was checking on me. How I wasnt feeling good. How I was tired. How I was hungry and you know what? It makes me sick. It makes me sad. That's not who I am or who I ever want to be!
But here's the cool part- in my weakness, He's so delightfully strong. When I'm little, He's enormous. When I'm straggling along, He's running beside me saying, "You got this C Lyle. Go girl! Finish!" I wasnt acting like my God was beside me, but He was. He's faithful like that.
I wanna love wildly. Live Outrageously.
A life and love so bold, it demolishes the bounds that ensnare us to act normal. I want a servants heart of reckless abandonment. My humanness stinks and I want Jesus' sweet aroma to permeate my heart and soul so that whether I'm trudging up a mountain or relaxing on a beach, His love volcanically erupts out of me. Loveless compassion is not an option.
I want more.
It was a muddy journey up that mountain but I'm stoked God used the hike to show me how His love wants to explode in my life. How He wants to blast compassion through each crevice in my weary heart. How in the desolate places of that same heart, He wants to dig and plant a beautiful garden.
It's been a while since I let anyone venture there, God. Some of those places are unchartered territories but I'm pumped to see what You grow!
"As the Father loved Me, I have also loved you; abide in my love."
John 15:9
