More often than not I have to shake my head at myself and laugh at how often I get wrong about WHO is running the show.
I always think it's me.
"11 months living in the field. Not always going to be comfortable. How am I going to do that?"
"I need to raise how much money? That doesn't even include all the expenses? How on earth am I going to do that?"
"I tend to get sick easily. How am I going to stay healthy?"
I mean I am sure if I kept on going I could fill this blog with question after question about how am I going to accomplish something.
I, I, I
ME, ME, ME!
"WHOA! Wait a minute,"
HE says (with a chuckle, I might add).
"WHO is doing all of this? You? Really?"
And then I hear God… laugh.
Not a condemning "you're dumb" kind of laugh. Not at all! But the kind of laugh you give to a child who in their complete child-like faith and abandon say something that seems really quite impossible but is so simple and innocent you can't help but smile and want to hold them close as your heart soars with even more love for them.
That kind of laugh.
All I could say in response was, "…oh. True. THANK GOD!"
You see, from the very start, this trip was never about me.
Sure, when I first heard about the trip I thought it sounded cool and could be a lot of fun. But I never even thought of going until my heart was stirred.
And the thing about your heart being stirred. It just doesn't happen by itself.
There is ALWAYS something on the outside that moves you.
A picture. A story. A commercial with puppies or orphaned children.
A quote. A verse.
GOD!
All He wants and needs from me is to trust Him completely.
And He WILL, 100%, take care of every other
little and big thing coming my way.
That includes world race life, my health, finances, etc, etc, etc…
As He stirred my heart from the beginning, He will stir the hearts of those He wants to invest
in what HE is going to do and to care for me.
I just need to sit back, LISTEN to Him, FOLLOW HIS leading, and TRUST.
"Now without faith it is impossible to please God…
By faith Abraham, when he was called, obeyed and
went out to a place he was going to receive as an inheritance;
he went out, not knowing where he was going.
By faith he stayed as a foreigner in the land of promise,
living in tents with Isaac and Jacob, co-heirs of the same promise.
For he was looking forward to the city that has foundations,
whose architect and builder is God."
– Hebrews 11:6, 8-10
This picture (though a little fuzzy) was a picture that was first given to me from my mother as a child. It was to remind me that no matter what was happening, where I was headed, or what my circumstances were that God was and would constantly be holding me up and taking care of every detail. It's a picture I have framed in my room today.
The words at the top of the picture, "Will you trust ME?" is a question I may have to ask myself every single day.
But that's ok. As long as each time it's asked I answer, "Yes, Lord, I trust YOU", I know everything will be fine.
He called me to this. He will make a way.
And together, WE will see it through.
