So I made it here to launch. (which is the few days in Washington D.C. before we leave) We leave on Friday sometime. We don't know when yet, but we know that is when we are leaving. Right when we got here, we had our first session for treasurers.
I was exhausted from not sleeping the night before and from traveling for the day. Immediately, they start talking about budgets and computer stuff and numbers and just basic treasurer stuff. My brain was SOOO overwhelmed.
If you didn't know, I have been called to be the treasurer on my team. That makes me so nervous. When they asked me back at training, before I accepted the position, I went into the woods and cried. I didn't want to do it and didn't understand why God would call me to do that. Once I opened my hands and released it to Him, I knew I was supposed to do it.
Flash forward to last night. I felt the same thing, but to the extreme .
Assignment 1: You have 15 minutes to figure out your budget for your team this week, figure out what food you will buy and go to the grocery store for 30 minutes and buy your food. You have to use the utensils you have and only have a mini fridge and microwave. ok, GO!!! That was my assignment. I was so out of my element.
I almost lost it because I was trying to do it on my own. I couldn't. I could NOT do it by myself. I knew it wouldn't get done if I did. So I did ask one of my fellow treasurers and pretty much just followed their plan.
It got done, but it would not have gotten done by myself. I needed help. This is NOT something I am good at. These past 24 hours I have been emotionally trying to deal with my stuff by myself and I have been mentally trying to do things myself. Let me tell you that it hasn't been pretty in only 24 hours.
I have been stressed and anxious and sad and mad and everything inbetween. I have been trying to do things on my own when God is just trying to tell me to lean on Him. I have had some really good prayer time and have cried out to God. He has been releasing my emotions and stress. I know He has me and He is leading me in how to NOT do things myself. He is not calling me to do things alone, but He is calling me to rely on Him and the people around me. We are not called to do things alone. Who are you relying on today?
