Hmm… where did I leave off?
Oh, yes, my last blog I spoke about our stay in Guija, Mozambique.
Let’s continue shall we.
We were told by our host that much of the nuclear family in Guija is dismantled and broken. Many families here struggle to make ends meet and need to find other ways to provide for their children. Many of them travel to South Africa for work. Sadly, many of them do not return, and their children are left with their grandparents or left in the care of the local church.
We met an older woman who was caring for her three grandchildren. As she was picking leaves to start cooking lunch, her grandchildren were looking at us with a sense of hopelessness. Their parents left them in her care but had yet to call her or send money for them. In order to attend school, all children must have a uniform. They still didn’t have enough to get uniforms. Our team asked Tenny if we could help buy uniforms for them but reluctantly he shook his head no. He stated that if we were to buy for these children, news would spread in the community and Tenny would be forced to supply the entire town with school uniforms. It’s nearly impossible.
I forgot to mention that Guija is a communist country. The way it works in this community is if you buy for one you must buy for all; that’s just the way it is here. We listened to many stories like this woman. It was disheartening and we felt… well… helpless. We didn’t know how we could help them. Tenny just told us to pray.
Pray? That’s it?
In my mind, I kept thinking we had to do more than just pray! I began to doubt the power of prayer because we didn’t see real results yet.
Then God whispered a little reminder to me, that whatever I ask in his name he would do it (Matthew 7:7).
BUT I WANTED TO SEE IT!
I wanted to see him provide in a mighty way! I wanted to believe that my prayer actually had power! I must admit, I was letting my pride get to me. I didn’t understand why God just wanted us to pray. In being obedient, we continued to just pray.
Later on that same day, I was able to pray for a woman named Marta. The father of her five children had taken off leaving his family behind. I felt the pang of abandonment for Marta. I was saddened for her! I couldn’t imagine being left alone to take care of myself and my five children. I remember as we approached her, she couldn’t look at us. Her head was bowed as she continued to pick the leaves in her bowl. As she was tending to what might have been their only meal the day, my team and I gathered around her and we prayed. I prayed that God would comfort her, that he would provide immensely for her and her family. I also prayed that dear Marta would hear the voice of God saying that she is enough; she is loved by him and he has not forgotten her. In that moment, I realized that my prayer did have power. Marta’s back was towards me the entire time, but while I was praying, my team told me she had been crying.
Something lifted. Something moved in Marta’s heart. I knew it was the Lord. He had heard me! He heard us! He heard Marta even in her silence! Now Marta does not know English, but that didn’t matter. God had touched both of us that day.
On our last week here, we visited a prison. The building was not very big and there was over fifty inmates. Their clothes and mattresses were hanging on the walls. There were no cells, no beds, and no bars. Just a large room big enough to hold about seventy people and a bathroom. At first, the team and I were a little hesitant because we are an all-girls team. Thoughts raced in my mind that these men would come onto us. As we walked in, the men were sitting on the floor waiting for us to take our seats. Ok, I was really nervous at this point. We sat in chairs next to the prisoners. Some of them smiled at us while others just simply stared.
Suddenly, all at once, the men stood up and started to worship. I could see a couple of men in the front praying, lifting their hands, and some closing their eyes as they communed with the Lord. I wasn’t nervous anymore. I just smiled at them. At that moment, the Lord whispered in my spirit.
“Look at your brothers.”
I couldn’t help but smile. It was a sight to see and so inspiring. Tenny had a memory verse competition with the men, as well as a dance and singing competition. Some men recited memory verses, while other groups performed worship songs and dances. We were able to sing to them as well. Tenny also spoke words of encouragement to the men in the prison. He reminded them, that although they had made some mistakes in their live, God had not forgotten them. He told them that the Lord still had a plan for their lives. Most importantly, he shared that nothing, not even their crimes, could separate them from the love of Christ. The girls and I thoroughly enjoyed ourselves at the prison and so far the best day of ministry in Guija.
As we left the men waved us goodbye, and I couldn’t help but think to myself how God was already redeeming the lives here in Guija. I prayed for my brothers, that they would not live in the fear of their past or live in the shadow of their crimes but walk in victory believing whole heartedly that God has forgiven them and still has a plan for their lives.
Let me be honest with you all, ministry has been … well, not as we expected. We thought we were going to come to Guija and actually see miracles happen here. We were ready to heal the sick, provide the community with food like how Jesus fed the 5,000 with just 5 loaves and 2 fish! We were ready to go and deliver Guija from its practice of witchcraft and bring hundreds to Jesus.
But this didn’t happen.
For about two weeks my team and I continued to pray for Guija. We asked God to heal the sick, to provide for each family here, and to expel Satan from this town. However, we didn’t get to see him do it from our hands. As I sat with the Lord, I asked him why this was happening. “God, why can’t we see you heal this people? Are we not good enough to heal? Are we not believing enough?”
Then God was silent for a moment. I kept asking him but I couldn’t hear him clearly. I checked my heart to see if I was just wanting to heal to boost up my pride.
But it wasn’t that.
Maybe I hadn’t been praying enough.
But it wasn’t that.
Maybe it wasn’t that we were believing in the power of healing.
Nope, not that either.
Finally, one Sunday as we were coming back from church, God spoke into my heart something that I will carry with me throughout this journey. He asked, “Even if you don’t see them healed, even if you don’t see the miracles, and if you don’t see the fruit of your prayers right now, will you still believe that I can do it. Will you still trust me?”
This stuck with me for the entire time I was in Mozambique. God was asking if the ministry was enough. That even if I didn’t get to see our prayers answered, that I would still choose to believe that he was working. I was so held up by the fact that we didn’t get to see a miracle happen, that I forgot moments like seeing a crippled woman crawl out of her home so that we can pray for her. Or playing with the little kids by the well every morning. I forgot the joy one woman had when one of my teammates gave her a beautiful scarf.
THESE MOMENTS MATTERED AND THEY MATTERED TO GOD.
The problem was that I wanted to see a real miracle! You know, “see a lame person get up and walk” kind of miracle. However, God gave me a peace in my heart to know that even if we don’t see the fruit here, we can be assured that he is still working behind the scenes and he will answer our prayers in his timing.
What God taught me this month was that I could trust him even if I don’t see his hand. As I look back at this past month in Mozambique, I really felt that God wanted us to spend as much time with him as we could. He gave us ample time each day to meet with each other, pray, worship and read the Bible. We were able to draw closer to him in this month. I forgot how important it was to just rest in him and meet with him.
Sometimes ministry doesn’t look like a mega church, or a pastor preaching to a village, or even evangelizing to people in the streets.
Sometimes ministry looks like loving on your sisters in Christ, praying with them, crying with them, and laughing with them.
Sometimes ministry looks like sitting next to your ministry host and praying for the community or it looks like playing with children outside while they use you as a human jungle gym (not kidding).
Sometimes it looks like praying for a father’s baby girl in hopes that she’ll make it past 1 years old.
Ministry doesn’t always look like we want but it doesn’t mean God is not in control. He oversees it all and he is still working just as he did in the Bible. I believe that the work here in Guija is not done. The people here are too special to him and I can’t wait to hear more about what God is going to be doing here.
Until next time Mozambique, we’re off to Swaziland!
