TRAINING CAMP
L-Squad: September 2012, Route 4
L-Squad: September 2012, Route 4
(L-Squad fam, all 29386 of us)
I don't even know where to begin.
For training camp, we had to pack and get ready as if we were leaving to go and start the race. We would be there for a week, and the staff deliberately made it known that we weren't going to know what happens until we get there, and even when we were there things such as living situations and activities weren't announced until time of.
First issue I encountered: I am the biggest procrastinator on the planet. So since there were no absolutes and black and white specifics of what to pack, I basically packed my entire life belongings into a 55L hiking bag and a day pack: a sleeping bag, tent, too many articles of clothing, a fake tattoo sleeve, no pillow, a mandolin, Moo-Moo my stuffed animal, war paint, my laptop, Bible, 2 journals, etc. I found out little direction, and preparing for something without prior knowledge is hard.. Periodically I prayed, "Sweet Jesus, please don't send a gust of wind to knock me over."
(first day of school/camp face)
The staff could've told me everything.
They could've told me what to pack.
They could've told me how camp was going to go.
They could've told me that Jesus was going to rain down the Holy Spirit to saturate and fill my heart.
They could've told me that my life and all it's junk would be painfully uncovered and exposed.
They could've told me I would experience the ridiculously awesome gracious healing power and freedom of Christ, in response.
They could've told me that I might be wearing the same articles of clothing for 2 and a half days straight and smell like a zoo animal.
Or even that I would be meeting and living with some of the greatest men and women of God I've ever known…
They could've told me what to pack.
They could've told me how camp was going to go.
They could've told me that Jesus was going to rain down the Holy Spirit to saturate and fill my heart.
They could've told me that my life and all it's junk would be painfully uncovered and exposed.
They could've told me I would experience the ridiculously awesome gracious healing power and freedom of Christ, in response.
They could've told me that I might be wearing the same articles of clothing for 2 and a half days straight and smell like a zoo animal.
Or even that I would be meeting and living with some of the greatest men and women of God I've ever known…
But they didn't.
And I'm SO glad.
And I'm SO glad.
Walking into situations were nothing is expected is absolutely freeing. It frees us up for a raw and real response, not something practiced and rehearsed. It frees up the Lord to work in ways in which we never thought or imagined.
At camp, SO many things happened. I feel this is a direct result of just letting go and surrendering of all expectations as a whole.
Second issue I encountered: I came to the realization that although I had been speaking God's truth and life since becoming a Christian, I in NO way deeply and seriously believed it. I was astonished, and broken by this. I didn't take the words of God seriously. I was such a great actress. His words and truth never penetrated my heart as deeply as they did this past week–He rocked my soul.
Ephesians 1:17-21
"I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the glorious Father, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and revelation, so that you may know him better. I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come."
I've prayed that prayer over SO many people this past year. I had no CLUE that Jesus has been putting this prayer on my heart FOR MYSELF.
The main thing that sticks out of this passage for me, THE ENLIGHTENED HEART.
the hope to which He's called us, the riches of the inheritance, the power for us who believe.
it's incredible.
it's terrifying.
it's messy.
it's worth risking everything for.
While at camp, Jesus destroyed my preconceived notions, and ideologies.
He gently picked up my heart, gave it a good squeeze, and opened it's eyes.
He's drawing me more to Himself through shattering my expectations of how He works and life in general, through shattering the lies of satan, through shattering the walls of my heart that I've placed up over the years–all the while RESTORING and HEALING and LOVING ON and EMBRACING my soul.
It's totally insane, and..
He gently picked up my heart, gave it a good squeeze, and opened it's eyes.
He's drawing me more to Himself through shattering my expectations of how He works and life in general, through shattering the lies of satan, through shattering the walls of my heart that I've placed up over the years–all the while RESTORING and HEALING and LOVING ON and EMBRACING my soul.
It's totally insane, and..
ALL FOR HIS GLORY!
…want to hear more about my new team, my healing, dancing, and camp as a whole? look out for part two!!
