As you may have already seen (or maybe not), my team is spending most of our month in Malaysia on Tioman Island. Our purpose here is to Ask the Lord (ATL) and obey what He says. This means we do a whole lot of loving people, building relationships, and having intentional conversations. Each day has been different, but each day has also been victorious. Let me tell you about one of my favorite victories thus far…conversations with a guy I’ll call D.
As I was sitting alone reading, there was a guy behind me also sitting alone. I felt a nudge in my spirit to go talk to him, but I made some excuses and procrastinated a little (one day I’ll learn to say yes right away). Finally, I got up and turned to him, and he asked where I was from. We started talking, just about why we were on the island, what we had done that day, what we were going to do later, etc. I said I might go swimming, and he said he would like to join. Well, I didn’t really want to go swimming with a complete stranger by myself, so I went to find at least one other teammate. As it turns out, while we were getting ready to go, the whole team decided they wanted to go. So off we went, 7 girls swimming in the ocean, along with my new friend D. We talked for awhile in the water, and I started asking him about his religion. I found out that he and his family are muslims, but they don’t go to a mosque and they only read the quran sometimes. When I asked what muslims believe about Jesus, he said he didn’t know. (When I think about that it blows my mind!) I asked what he believed would get him into heaven and he said good works. He said if you don’t do enough good works to go to heaven then you go to hell, but after a certain time you go to heaven. This was when I shared that I don’t believe works will get me to heaven, but that the Bible says we only have to believe in God and if we do that we will go to heaven. How I explained it, and the whole conversation at that point, was SUPER awkward! We talked a little bit more, but that was the end of talking about anything related to God.
The next morning during my quiet time I was processing through the conversation, and I was struggling with how it went. I almost felt ashamed or embarrassed of it, and I didn’t want anyone to know. I kept thinking of the various ways it could have gone better, and I felt like I had failed somewhat as a missionary or was at least very ineffective in spreading the Gospel.
Because of the growth I’ve experienced on the Race, I chose not to sit in my shame like I would have before. Here was the beautiful conclusion God brought me to:“But when is bringing up Jesus ever a thing I should be ashamed of in any context? When should stepping out of my comfort zone ever be anything other than a victory? When should I ever doubt God’s abilities to use even my messiest failures for His glory? NEVER! It was a seed that was planted, even if it was planted in the “wrong way”. With some water and fertilizer that seed can still grow and be fruitful. With God, all things are possible, and there’s nothing I, a mere human, could ever do to hinder God’s plans. I am not that powerful, that’s for sure. I can’t give myself that credit.” He brought me to 2 Corinthians 12:9-10 which says, “But He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Therefore, I will most gladly boast all the more about my weakness, so that Christ’s power may reside in me. So because of Christ, I am pleased in weakness, in insults, in catastrophes, in persecutions, and in pressures. For when I am weak, then I am strong.”
God, being the loving and faithful God that He always is, didn’t let that be my last conversation with D. Check out part 2 to find out how awesome and powerful God truly is!
