WOAH…
This last few weeks have been crazy! Last week I made my way to Georgia where I spent a week at training camp for the World Race. I tried not to have many expectations. I knew we'd be sleeping in our tents, eat not so normal food, and meet complete strangers who would become family. I had NO idea I would fall completely in love. I fell in love with people who I met only a few days ago, some felt like I knew my whole life. I fell even more head over heels in love with God. And most importantly I fell in love with myself.
(Pic taken by Laura Johnson)
Im not gonna lie, training camp was hardddddddd. The start of training camp was pretty crazy. We did not waste any time. Right when we got there we put our tents up and then went to awesome sessions where we dove straight in to working on ourselves. These sessions were amazing even though sometimes it was hard to stay awake (thanks Stephanie B lol). We had a guest speaker named Ron Walborn who came and spoke to us. At the first of the week I felt like I wasn't 100% connected. I wanted to be so bad, but for some reason I couldn't get there. I felt like sometimes I was just going through the motions, which made me angry because I wanted be be so badly! At one point I stopped and just prayed. I didn't even know what to say but God knew what was on my heart. He knew what I wanted but he wanted me to be patient, it was going to be his time. One night we were praying and I was sitting there thinking, “ok God what do I need to do to get all the way there? Look at these people around me, they are all there and i'm not. You did call me to come on this race didn't you?” I heard nothing back. I still just sat there waiting. Somebody, I have no idea who, came up and started praying for me. She prayed exactly everything I needed to hear. I know God used her to get to me. I felt these walls break down. I finally felt FREE. I broke all of the chains off my heart. I let go of regrets that i've held onto for years. I realized that in order to be free I have to let go. I knew exactly what I had to let go of, and for the first time I didn't fight God about it. I was FINALLY ready to let go and let God. I learned so much after I finally let go and was free! I learned its OK to not be ok, that being broken is so beautiful, and that God loves me NO MATTER what with no questions ask! How awesome is that?!?!
(Yeah he loves me for me lol)
After that I was WRECKED, point blank period! (Or so I thought) There had been a HUGE change in me, there was no doubt about it, however something still was missing. After going on an outing with my new family (which ill get to in a bit) I still felt a little disconnected. I thought I was just tired and being a little shy. That night we entered in Grace Chapel where we had our worships. During worship my AMAZING sister in Christ, Cheyenne, came and prayed over me. Her prayer made any walls that were still around my heart completely tumble down. Thanks Cheyenne 🙂
After spending time in prayer with certain members on my squad and sometimes just spending time alone with God, I realized something huge! God knows my heart, he knows me inside and out, he thinks i am beautiful and i am perfect the way i am in his eyes! I have a squad of 62 other people who love me for exactly who i am. I don't need to change for anybody!
(birthday adventure= taco bell! BEST bday ever haha)
That next day was my birthday and it was pretty amazing! We ate good food this day, minus dinner, which was HUGE! It was so refreshing to get to spend my birthday around such awesome people who were so on fire for God! And it also helped that I even got a “birthday adventure” (Thanks Amanda G., Micah, and Alyssa). I cannot wait to see what God has in store for this next chapter in our lives. Just being with the squad for a week showed me how powerful we are all together. I KNOW we are going to do amazing things in Jesus name!
(My awesome card my L squad fam got me. Truly was amazing! Love yall)
So with that being said, I am super PUMPED to be leaving in 5 weeks! I have an aaaaahhhhmazing team that i will be working with day in and day out for the next year! So please come on this journey with me! I can't do it without you! Please be praying for my squad and please follow my blog!!!! Love yall so much!
