Well, I guess it’s about time I wrote this. “This” being the “I’m home!” blog. I’ve sat down to write it at least 6 times. I’ve started typing and thinking…and nothing. What do I say? How do I put into words all that I’m feeling. Well, I still haven’t figured it out, but since it’s been 3 weeks I figured I had better suck it up and post SOMETHING!
So, I’m home. After two weeks of shenanigans on the east coast with my squadmate Poppy, New York to Boston. Thanksgiving in Maine, cheesesteaks in Philly, and exploring the monuments in D.C., I finally made it back home to Grove last weekend. As I begin this transition back into American life, re-entry, I’m over
whelmed and left wondering….
I’m wondering, how is it that I can spend 25 years in America, leave for 11 months, and come back completely ruined. My “normal” has changed. They told us at training camp that it would happen and warned us in month 8 that home was coming and we were different. But I never expected to find it strange to flush my toilet paper, hear conversations happening around me in English, that daily showers are not only available but expected, or that the options at a grocery store are endless…can we talk about the number of cheez-it flavors now available? And my new relationship with a restaurant menu, well I have decided to just get nothing at a few places after studying the menu for what seems like hours and not being able decide on any one thing. It’s ridiculous, I know, but I can’t seem to do anything about it. I’ve only just stopped hoarding napkins to keep in my pockets in case there isn’t toilet paper in the next bathroom I use. Like I said, ruined.
But it’s the best kind of ruined. It’s a beautiful ruined. I’ve heard it called “wrecked for the ordinary.” It’s the kind of ruined that shifts things. My normal has shifted in all kinds of ways, not just the obvious, socially awkward ways. My NORMAL now involves living each day AWARE of the presence of God. Seeking divine appointments every place I go. WORSHIPPING with reckless abandon, from ribbon dancing across the room to lying flat on my face in the presence of God. Declaring LIFE over each person that I encounter. Listening for God’s voice and obeying it…every day. Allowing the Holy Spirit to use me…in any way He wants to…no matter how crazy it seems. The challenge is being the new normal in the old home. So, bear with me, go ahead and order for me, help me walk away from the napkins and free ketchup, and ask me questions…because when it comes to talking about all the reasons why I’m different well, it’s hard to know where to begin.
And stay tuned, because that one part, the part where I strive to let the Holy Spirit use me and lead me, well, that is sure to be quite the adventure…
