THAILAND | Phuket
PEACE: A feeling of calmess because you know Gos is in control of all things. Needed when you walk the busy streets of Bangala Road with music so loud you can’t hear yourself think, while at the same time being pulled on from either side by desperate girls and women trying to persuade you to drink at their bars for fear they won’t have enough money to support their families. Trying not to notice the gentlemen with their hungry eyes and the small children with their parents who think that it will have no effect on them. Knowing that without this peace from the God of the Universe that I might scream at any second due to the countless emotions that pump through every heart beat.
LOVE: Unconditional. Needed when speaking with the women at the bars, who look lifelesssly at you because they see no hope in the darkness of their present state. To see past, the lack of covering, heavy makeup, and flatter talk to see the emptiness in their eyes, the feeling of anything but beautiful, or the questioning answers deciding whether or not they trust you or if you will be just another tourist, just another no-name individual that sees her as a product instead of a human being. Needed more for the men that wander with broken pasts and false conclusions on what their purpose is, completely lost in a world where pleasure and self-indulgence take priority. For the men/boys that are even more empty and unsatisfied than the girls they sit and watch. Knowing without the deep and unconditional love from the Father, I might let the anger and judgements take over and fail to see the desperate need for God’s sons and and daughters to be loved.
JOY: State of being that comes from being in love with a God that loves perfectly. Needed to cut through the darkness that lays heavily on the streets, to be a light to those than can no longer see because of the blackness of the pit they are living in. To be different than the other hundreds of people that stroll down the streets because of the glow that it brings to your face. To bring hope to the girl sitting across the connect four game by simply staring at her directly in the eyes and smiling. Knowing that without this overflowing joy I would sufficate underneath the burden, pain, and darkness of the things I witness night after night.
