9. You carry around a thing in your pack for four months before you realize it's trash.
8. It's more strange to sleep in a bed than it is on the ground.
7. You're 1up phrase has become: "I haven't washed my clothes in…"
6. Fast-food wifi hotspots have become your "holy grail".
5. You dream of flusing your toilet paper.
4. You are stuck wondering why so many things taste like chicken.
3. For your birthday, you have begun to ask people for a foot scrubber.
2. You've screamed declarations from the top your lungs scaring Satan and little children/old women.
And the #1 way you know you're on the world race is…..
1. Those three special words are: You're parasite FREE!
