So, I did it. Yup, that's right. Sold my car, some of my stuff, (gave most of it away), stored my keepsakes in my Aunt's garage, and left. I took a plane to Fort Lauderdale, and got to hang out with the people who introduced me to the Holy Spirit. (It's like God is watching over me or something…) I left the country with a light heart.
I arrived in Guatemala City with a heavy pack.
Halfway through the airport, with sweat pouring down my brow and my quads burning a new pain I had never felt before I began to sing an ad-libbed anthem that I only sing when I move: 

“I have too much crap! I have too much crap! I have too much…” (Repeat for full effect).
I have already dumped a significant amount of things from my pack, whenever I sling my things over my back, I think twice, “Do I really need all of this?”
After an airplane, a train, a van ride, and a six seven eight hour bus ride (involving having the bus drivers give me the "you're a stupid tourist" look after using all of the Spanish skills I have), we arrive at our destination. I am so exhausted from the trip, I don't even think I remembered that I had a wicked runny nose and nasty cough. We arrive at a ministry that specializes in Christian radio and being a positive influence to dark places within Puerto Barrios. They give introductions and I see the light of God shine in a very dark place.
I also realize that here, I have nothing to hide. I have nothing to hide behind. I have a “fresh start”. And for some reason, I feel a bit more confined to “make a good impression”, on people/my hosts/those whom I live with.
Why am I trying so hard? Why do I want them to like me?
Maybe I think, deep down, that “If only they knew that…
I was a goth kid
I was angry at the world
I've been to counseling three times for self worth issues
(repeat for full effect)”
Maybe I'm scared, “what if they LIKE me?”
Maybe that means I'll have to take a risk, and LET GOD TAKE CARE OF ME…
Amid taking care of children in the city dump, visiting the elderly, prostitute ministry, and plays and skit ministry, what if I actually stick my neck out and trust that God will provide.
What if this is where God wanted me all along, letting Him be my everything?
