2017 was a great year for me. It was also my toughest year, spiritually. Especially the last 2-3 months. I continuously found myself in situations that I know I should not have been in. I reached a low point to where I questioned my salvation and questioned if I even wanted to pursue a relationship with Him anymore.
Crazy right?
Now, I’m sure you’re saying “How can you say it was a great year for you?” I can say it was a great year for me because I learned so much about myself through Him. Since I haven’t left for the race yet, I can say that I was challenged in a way that I would have never expected. I was pushed to my limits and a lot of the trials I went through were brought upon myself. I learned that I do that a lot. I tend to get myself in situations and somehow tell myself that “this is where God wants me” or “He’s going to do something with me though this”. Which may be true, but, He’s not the reason I am finding myself in a mess..
Next comes the doubts “Am I truly in a relationship with Christ?”. Or, here’s the good one, “Is He even listening?”. That question is the one I asked the most throughout the year. As I sit back and I reflect I realize that that question isn’t for Him, its for ME. I realized that He was asking me, through every trial, if I was listening. I realized that if I would have listened before I made decisions or listened to Him when things are good and not just bad, things would have been better.
Listening is hard in general and not everyone is good at it. A lot of people listen to give responses or they listen for their own satisfaction in gaining information. Which is something else I learned about myself. I tend to listen to Him more when He is telling me something that benefits me, which lead me to look deeper. I noticed that listening to Him requires me to admit that I need help. It requires me to admit that I don’t have all the answers and that I’m not as great as I put on to be.
In 2018 I’m not going to be that stubborn. Will I still go through things? Of course. Will I still find myself getting into tough situations? Probably. But God will still be the same. He will be there to instruct me and to show me the way out. I just have to listen. I have to surrender my pride, and accept that I can’t do anything on my own. I need Him for everything I do in this life. I can’t do life without Him. Through all of this, I was able to experience Him and His glory in such an amazing way. 2018 isn’t my year, but it’s His to do whatever He pleases with me..
What about you? Are you listening to Him when He speaks? If your 2017 was like mine, how are you going to let the Lord make 2018 better? Below I have posted a song called “Are You Listening?” by United Pursuit. The lyrics to this song are simple but so powerful, the most being “when I breathe I admit that I need you.” This song has done so much for me and I hope that it does the same for you.
Will you listen?
