One of my mentors, Chris Hodge, took several weeks last year to talk to me about fear. During each conversation, he would inevitably refer to a passage called “The Litany of Fear” from the book Dune. The passages reads:
“I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little death that bring total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”
I thought of this passage because a big fear of mine was not having a plan. I have always been a planner and careful decision maker. I like time to reflect and think about my ideal end state, and then work backwards to reach my goal. So until December, when I decided to commit to the World Race, I was struggling to craft a genuine story behind why I wanted an MBA. The reality was, I didn’t have a story or good reason. All I had was brokenness over the loss of my military career and fear because I didn’t know how I was going to make a difference in the world.
Fortunately, God planned my first school’s rejection and took me in a totally different direction!
Since deciding to go on the World Race, I’ve faced this fear. I’ve accepted that I do not have a career plan or long-term vision for my life. I have ideas, hopes, and dreams, but my desires have been superseded by God’s call. So I’m embracing my brokenness and surrendering to his truths. I’m letting go of my plans for His plans. I’m letting God the gears in his perfect timing. In return, I’ll gain the Spirit’s peace.
While the litany of fear is awesome and very accurate (if you face your fear, then look for the fear afterward, your fear will be gone), I discovered through prayer on my ride home that this great quote is connected to a scripture that I memorize long ago – Psalms 23. As I sat in the car and the words entered my mind – peace filled me.
Short, but powerful. Every circumstance covered – rest in nourishing environments, moments of refreshment that restore our souls, His presence and guiding rod in fearful times. And He lets us know that he will deliberately place us in front of our enemies then lavish us with his abundance to show His sovereignty. What a King!
For me, choosing to go on the World Race was never about possessions or money or the normal challenges most people face. Choosing to go was about CHOOSING TO LET GO! It’s about abandonment and embracing the lack of a plan so that God can open my eyes to His plan. I beat my fear the minute I chose to say,”Yes, Lord.”
What’s your fear? Is it provision? Is it qualification? Is it losing your possessions? It’s different for everyone, but each must face their fears to truly walk with the shepherd. He WILL lead us through our fears, but we must let him.
