Hey all and welcome to my World Race blog! Words truly cannot describe how excited I am to not only begin this journey, but to invite you all alongside me. My heart for this blog is to share all the exciting work the Lord has done, and will continue to do both in preparation for the race and while I’m gone. For my first post, I really want to share with y’all what led me to the race.
The World Race first popped onto my radar four years ago, when my older brother, Andy, announced to our family that he planned to visit eleven countries in eleven months. As he told me about his plans for the race, I remember being so proud, but believing I wasn’t cut out for something like that. After all, God didn’t pick people like me for mission work. I was broken. I had made mistakes, and I didn’t always learn from them. I went to a Catholic school my entire life, and with that, I formed a great theological foundation, but I was really lacking the heart. I came to know God on a deeper level right before my Freshman year of college, but even then, my faith wasn’t mature. I couldn’t wrap my mind around the Lord’s forgiving nature and I rested too heavily in the mistakes I’d made. Throughout my brother’s time on the race, and for years after, I felt the same way.
The Lord has really done some hard work on my heart this year, and I’ve been lucky enough to have some really great people placed in my life. People that have shown me the Lord’s love, kindness, and forgiveness in such a real way that I’ve been truly overwhelmed. God used those people to change my heart. He used those people to open my eyes to the kind of love I could show other people if I took a leap of faith.
My plan to go abroad started forming about six months ago. I found a four month teaching program in Thailand that sounded perfect and had everything I wanted. I soon announced the plan to my family and friends and began filling out an application. And while I started the application in November, I still hadn’t finished it by the beginning of February. Something about that felt off. I’m known for procrastinating, but never on something I genuinely care about.
This forced me to wonder if I even wanted to go to Thailand. The honest answer was no. Something in my heart had changed and I could feel the Lord pulling me toward something greater. This led me to the World Race. For the first few weeks, I kept my research to myself because I wasn’t sure if I fully wanted to go there. I knew from my brother that the race was a huge commitment and completely life changing. I could feel the fear taking over and I wasn’t sure if I was ready for that.
The first time I openly discussed the race was with my friend, Meredith. We were sitting on my couch and I realized how badly I wanted to tell someone, so I just put it out there, and as we talked, I realized my true fear behind applying. I was afraid of change. I was afraid that if I went on the race, I would leave behind all the sins I’d so comfortably surrounded myself with for years. If I left the comfort of my friends, family, work, and lifestyle, what would I be forced to recognize? The conversation brought a lot of light to the situation and I decided to think and pray a little more before I mentioned it to anyone else. I mean, at the core, did I really want to change?
A few more weeks went by before I decided to bring the subject up to my good friend, Amelia. She and I have been friends since our freshman year of college, and I really respected her opinion. I knew she was the next person I had to speak with if I wanted to move forward. As we started talking about the race, I realized how excited I was getting, and after we hung up the phone I immediately called my brother. Both Amelia and Andy were so encouraging. They thought the race was right up my alley and I was thrilled to hear it. The race became all I could think about, and although a part of me was still so scared, I decided to start the application.
I’ll be honest, the application was hard for me. The race asks you to be incredibly vulnerable and share who you are a lot in your application. Vulnerability has never come naturally to me. For a long time, I felt like the more people knew, the more they could hurt me.
At this same time, I was beginning to dive deeper with my small group. I was opening up and processing through some of the more difficult parts of my story and some areas I’ve always felt too self conscience to acknowledge. Through some of these conversations, I realized I had a really deep fear of being fully known and fully loved. A part of me wondered, if someone ever fully knew me and everything I’d done, would they be able to fully love me? This question was painful and vulnerable and hard. I didn’t like it, but I felt safe enough with my group to approach and sort through these insecurities. God put the perfect people in my life and specifically in my small group to walk me through a really difficult realization and lead me to the truth of God’s word. I am fully know and fully loved in Christ, and that is enough. With this incredible reminder I was able to finish my application for the World Race and really dive into what the Lord had to offer me. After I applied for the race, there was a peace in my heart that I never found with Thailand.
So that’s the story of how I ended up here y’all, and let me tell you, I am so excited. I’ve already had the opportunity to speak with a few of my teammates, and let me tell you, they’re great. I know the Lord is setting me up for the journey of a lifetime, and I really just want to invite all of you alongside me in that.
If you have any questions about the race, or resonate with any parts of this blog, please feel free to reach out to me here, through email ([email protected]), or through text/call (352-872-3286).
If God is moving within you to donate, you can click the donate bottom at the top of my page, but regardless, I am just excited to share this experience with you. Any support, whether it be financial or emotional is so appreciate during this time.
Thank you again for reading!!
Cathy
