When we were heading into this month I felt extremely
uneasy. I thought I would be really
excited to come to Australia, but I didn’t have a peace about it at all. I knew this month wasn’t going to be
easy. I knew I would be challenged in
new ways and ministry wouldn’t be what we expected.
I was right. This
month was really hard for me. Our team
went through a lot just dealing with things we hadn’t dealt with the first 2
months. Ministry was really hard – the spiritual
warfare was intense. Every time it was
time to do ministry, I would get extremely tired and a headache. I didn’t have any desire to be there
honestly. I had a horrible attitude
towards ministry because it was so hard.
I felt like we were walking into a hopeless situation – I know that no
situation is hopeless, but the devil did a great job at convincing me that it
was. I also really struggled with
homesickness this month. It got to the
point that I just wanted to come home. I
didn’t want to be here anymore. I was
waiting for it to get better, but it never did.
Every day was a struggle to get through.
I realized that all
this was spiritual warfare. The devil
had figured out exactly how to get under my skin and ran with it. I realized that most of the problems I had
this month were due to my attitude. I
had to fight every time we went to do ministry to have the right attitude. I had to stay in constant prayer and
surrender to get through every day.
Ministry never got easier and my homesickness never really went away. I did learn a lot about relying on the Spirit
even when it’s not easy. I learned about
how God has a bigger plan and can use you even in the most un-ideal
situations. God had me here for a reason
this month. What we’ve learned in the
World Race is that it’s all about planting seeds – not necessary seeing them
blossom right in front of your eyes. God
used me this month to bless someone’s life even if it doesn’t feel like I
really did anything beneficial. He used
me to plant seeds and to bring hope and life into what seems a hopeless
situation.
As we move into a new month, I am filled with a sense of
excitement as to what it holds. I know
God is going to do huge things, and He has given me a renewed Spirit and a refreshed
attitude. It’s going to be a really
great month and I can’t wait to see what God has in store!
