Since being accepted to The Race, the past month for me has been pretty crazy. I mean why wouldn’t it be?! *mama don’t read the next few sentences* Last term during class, I’d find myself online shopping or scrolling through Pinterest. This term during class, I catch myself doing anything and everything I can for the race: reading packing list, watching videos, updating my latest fundraiser & thinking of what should be next, stressing about the funds and of course, thinking about absolutely everything but class. (she obviously still read it :/ sorry mom!) Friends here often ask me, what will the race will be like? Which just makes me want to read more blogs and watch more videos. Thinking I’ll find the answer to their question. It’s been a challenge to learn to balance school and the race; I’m paying for these classes so of course I want to succeed. Finding the happy medium is tough, but I’m getting better each day.
Thinking about raising $16,600 seems insane almost impossible. That is, until I step back and realize I’m in relationship with the God of the UNIVERSE and He’s going to allow me to serve Him?! I mean shoot! How cool is that?! This is His plan, so why should I be stressed about money? I shouldn’t. Recently I listened to a sermon that said, “He supplies where He calls us to, God only funds His ideas”. Big truth! The Lord will provide as long as I ask and trust Him to and am confident of that- I cannot wait to see how he grows me as I keep reminding myself to trust Him!
Lately my mind’s been wondering… what will the race actually look like? What will we eat? What will I have to do.. wait no, correction, will I get to do? Who will I encounter? How will He work in me during that time? It’s easy to read others’ blogs about the incredible things the Lord is doing in their life on the race and be eager to soon be in that similar place. But why should I wait for that? A friend of mine is doing YWAM right now, and she’s currently in Papua New Guinea. The other night we were catching up over text and she said something that really stuck out to me: “YWAM is really cool but YWAM isn’t how you get close to God, it’s just God”. I LOVE that! She is so right. Same goes for the race- it by itself isn’t how I’m going to get closer to God. It’s simply Him. He’s been working in me in amazing ways this year at school and I know He will continue to do so if I let him.
As I write this, I’m sitting at one of my favorite spots on campus. The education building has these two hanging pear-shaped white chairs that look out the window. It’s overcast today, but the sun is beginning to peak out. If you could see me, you’d see me observing everything around me as my feet are swinging all around and the air is blowing the chair all over the place. Strange that I’d trust this single chair enough to hold me up, as my feet swing searching for the floor, and not only think about falling. Something about it is just so relaxing. God is the same way. He wants me to TRUST Him in the same way I trust this chair won’t make me fall to the ground.
Amongst all the stress of trying to prepare, it’s hit me. No matter how many blogs I read, how many videos I watch, or how many times I read the packing list, nothing will be able to prepare me for the race except HIM. I love comfortableness and feeling prepared, but He is not a God of comfortableness so why should I desire to be comfortable? I have no clue what exactly to expect on The Race, but I think as I dive into this journey, it’s going to look a lot like me sitting in this pear shaped chair- sitting back observing the little things, feet swinging, wind blowing me in all directions. It is trusting I won’t fall and relaxing knowing that if or when I do, He will pick me back up again.
As the weeks go by here at WOU, I reflect more on what the Lord has shown me here so far. Boy oh boy has he shown me A LOT! Sometimes I’m sad at the thought I won’t be here next year. I get nervous. But I am so excited to allow Him to continue growing me in the NOW so I can go into the race with my feet swinging all over, trusting where He’ll send me.
Thanks for reading.
Catch ya next blog!
Love y’all, Cass
