I have called many places ‘home’ in my 22 years of life. For the first 18 years, the house that my parents still live in to this day was home, though during the summers Bonclarken Conference Center became my home away from home as I spent countless weeks there – both as a camper and a counselor. For four years of college I made my home in Witherspoon Hall, at least during the academic year. Then I spent 10 weeks coming home to a flat in the middle of Cochabamba, Bolivia where my family consisted of a husband and wife, their three daughters, two cocker spaniels, and a blind parrot – none of which spoke or understood English. A year later, I spent an entire summer calling Springhill Suites (yes, that is a hotel) in Charleston, SC my home while on a summer project with Cru. And since graduating in May, my home has been with the ladies of Apartment J, though that too will change at least once more before I leave for the World Race in January. And in these many homes, countless pieces of my heart have found new ‘homes’ in the hearts of the people that I’ve lived and loved with along the way.
They say that home is where the heart is, but some days that makes me feel like a bit of a wandering nomad. There is no one place that is completely ‘home’ for me anymore because my heart no longer belongs in just one place, with just one group of people, or doing just one activity. Next to Zephaniah 3:20 in my Bible, I have written a statement that was made by my friend Emily Hall, who I had the immense blessing of getting to know during my time in Charleston. As we were discussing the idea of ‘home,’ she said: “If home is where the heart is, and my heart is with Jesus, then home is wherever I am closest to Him.”
I have come back to that statement many times over the past year and it has comforted me on the days when the only way I can describe the way that I feel is homesick, even as I’m laying in my bed surrounded by all things familiar and comfortable. I have learned, and am continuing to learn, how to be okay with this state of perpetual ‘homelessness’ – because I have been reminded time and time again that this earth is simply not my home. As per usual, my girl Katie Davis seems to say it best:
“My heart lives in so many places. With so many people. But God whispers to me that I really have only one home, and that is with Him. I will never be content on this earth. I will always be a nomad. It was meant to be that way. My heart was created with a desire for a home, a nest, a sanctuary, and that can be found only with Him in heaven. And I will continue bouncing from one home to another, loving with everything I have in whatever location I currently reside, excitedly awaiting the day when I am called heavenward and He says to me, ‘Welcome Home.'”
If home is where the heart is, and my heart is with Jesus, then home is wherever I am closest to Him.
Ultimately, that is Heaven.
“At that time I will gather you; at that time I will bring you home.”
~Zephaniah 3:20~
In His love (always),
Cassady
