I have talked to many World Racers on why they chose their routes, launch windows, etc. Some say that they are at random, it fit with my schedule, or the countries sounded cool. When I sat at my desk in college a year and a half ago, ready to choose my route, I struggled with my decision. I could have picked any route but my heart was pulled to Route 1 for one reason, Cambodia.
Following my junior year of high school, I had the opportunity to go on a church mission trip to Cambodia, more specifically it’s capitol city Phnom Penh. I loved the country, fell in love with the people, and the children we worked with who were suffering in the human tr@fficking industry. In Cambodia I experienced what it looked like to live on less than a dollar a day and the desperation that would lead a family to sell themselves and their children to pimps to help pay for their livelihood. I felt the presence of overwhelming evil, sorrow, and helplessness on a mass scale. It was a sensory overload.
But I also experienced the goodness and joy of life in Christ. The local Christians we partnered with were some of the most genuine, kind, and loving people I have ever met. They showed me how material gain and financial security were not what God focused on in his promise of an abundance life. I was 16 learning and seeing things that most people I knew would never experience.
And there was now a chance to return and get to relive that experience and to see what the Lord would do this time.
I was going to go back to Phnom Penh because the Lord knew I wanted to go. I was going to see my old Cambodian friends because that was my desire.
I had expectations for the Lord and not expectancy from the Lord.
I expected the Lord to put me back in my comfort zone and let me relive my last experience. I am so glad he did not.
Our team partnered with Ezra Ministry in Battambang, Cambodia. Literally the other side of the country from Phnom Penh. Our ministry host brought us in and we lived the next month of life with her and her family. Mornings were spent helping her pack for her move out of country while the afternoons were spent working at an Christian English School. I loved our ministry and being able to build relationships with the teenagers of the city.
I was having an incredible time. I was building relationships and teaching the same kids everyday! We joked and laughed with each other and got the chance to really pursue them as people. What an opportunity to give and live out the gospel!
Our host was a sweet Australian missionary, Sharelle, and her son, Yannick, and they were just as enjoyable to be with as were the kids we got to work with daily! Yannick and us guys on our team stayed up till early in the morning playing Risk, joking around, and having deep conservation that I would never expect a 15 year old kid to have.
Cambodia was going great, I was finally learning how to ride a bike (and getting good at it if I say so myself), I loved our ministry and our hosts, the Noodle Man and La Pizza are still some of my top favorite restaurants on the race, I mean God was blowing my expectations out of the proverbial water.
I hope you see the turn coming.
Everything changed when I woke up not feeling too great. I felt a bit out of it, did not feel like eating and was a bit feverish. Halfway through the morning I went to lay down and in the blistering Cambodian heat, I was covered with a sleeping bag with no fans.
Something told me this wasn’t right.
To skip over the lovely details that followed, I had full blown dengue fever by the end of the night. A nasty mosquito carried disease that causes severe fever, body aches, nausea and vomiting, and for those who looked it up on Google, yeah, I had all the things. I could not walk without assistance and had a heightened sense of smell, which never helps anything when your sick.
Honestly, I was mad, to say the least, at God.
Because what I did not mention above was the last time I was in Cambodia I got dengue, luckily by the time it hit my system, I was already back in the states. This time I was stuck in a bed in Cambodia with no real health care other than coconut water and tea.
To make it worse, that weekend we were going to visit our old squad leader in Phnom Penh. I, of course, had to stay behind. The trip to see my favorite city taken away. I was physically suffering, and I blamed God really quick.
I got sick less than two weeks into the country I had signed up for on this Route. I missed the rest of ministry, I missed the trip with my team (I really just missed my team). I did not understand why the Lord would let this happen… AGAIN.
In those two weeks I avoided talking to the Lord. Luckily our God never gives up on us and chases after us.
My Squad Mentor Alissa called me to hear how I was handling the whole ordeal. I told her honestly how I was feeling physically, emotionally, and spiritually and she told me bluntly what she saw in me. She said there were still areas in my life that I did not trust the Lord.
Unfortunately it was true. I struggled with why I was not healed with prayer. I struggled on why he kept me, for a second time on the race, stuck in a bed. It scared me how quick I was to blame God and turn away and shun him.
So where’s the good stuff.
Yes I’m getting to it.
Ultimately I see why I went through what I did. I needed to see the weak spots in my trust on the Race, where I have a good community and leadership that sees and seeks the best in me, so I would have time to allow the Lord to fix it and not deal with the same results when problems happen at home.
Because the bad stuff does happen at home. Jobs are loss, family fights, sickness happens, and death occurs. I realized that the Lord needed me to experience it on a small scale to see the places in my heart I did not surrender to him so when it hits on a big scale back home, I can run to him.
And in Thailand I did, I came running back, and the growth and the fruit because of this experience is beyond what I could have expected from last month.
Cambodia was filled with a lot of good, some bad, and a whole lot of dengue. I am sad I missed out on the fun, the ministry, and the relationships. However, I would not have changed I thing if it would have meant I would have missed growing closer to the only one who matters.
Romans 8:28: “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.”
