Coffee shops are great places. They’re great places to study, get work done, search for the perfect cup of coffee, talk to old friends, and meet people from all over the world. They’re great places to play games and love on people. They’re also great places to develop relationships and to share the Gospel.
A lot of coffee shops in Ho Chi Minh City offer or host English clubs for students who are motivated to improve their conversational English skills. We worked alongside one of these coffee shops for the month of January, developing relationships with students we met, teaching English once a week, and providing tips and encouragement as they learn our difficult language. We planned coffee dates, went on day-trips to other parts of the city, and just spent time hanging out with people we met.
The difficult thing about this kind of ministry is that it’s very easy for it to become superficial and shallow, especially in a closed country. It’s easy to doubt the importance of what you’re doing when you’re only there for a month. It’s easy to get caught up in a lazy, tired rut and blame it all on your introverted-ness.
Actually, it’s easy in any kind of work to choose to believe your own excuses as to why you shouldn’t do what you’ve been told to do. The fact of the matter is that the Lord has given you something to do, even if it seems menial or meaningless, and He requires our obedience with our whole hearts. When we choose to say “no” to Him, we sin. When we choose our flesh over the God who sent His Son to die on a cross for us, we sin. Yet He still loves us and has credited us with HIS righteousness. None of us deserve that!
But I’ll get off my soap box and back to Vietnam.
So we’re working with this coffee shop and these students in Vietnam, and I realize that I have a problem. I think nobody really wants to talk to me or answer my questions (aka: fear of rejection). I play it safe, ask about their favorite kind of music, favorite Vietnamese food, etc., and I avoid asking harder questions. WHY? I might only talk to this person once, and I choose badminton as a topic? Really? I get that you have to get to know a person a little bit before you ask them about their deepest fears, but am I making the best use of the time I’m with each person? Do I view them as more than mere mortals?
Here’s my theory: People want to be asked the hard questions, even if they hate you at first for it. The hard questions are the formative questions that stick with you and make you think. And when those probing questions are asked out of a place of true desire to know the answer and out of a place of love for that person, usually that person comes out of the other end feeling more valued and loved. Getting over yourself and loving other people… well, what better way to love your neighbor as yourself?
