They are brought to their knees

and fall

But we, we rise up

and stand firm.

.

they are brought to their knees and fall,

But we rise up and stand firm.

.

horses colliding, armor clashing

swords arching in trained manuvers

men breaking teeth in their efforts,

the field heaves like the waves on the sea

the foam, bodies flung from steeds –

to lie without motion.

the battle cry becomes weeping in the aftermath.

men with rivers dried up

inside their chests

from their belts to their eyes

digging new wells they discover on the battle field

.

the bodies fill the wells

.

everytime they drink

blood sits in the bottom of the cups

.

dirt, 

our own recipe,

hides the deeds done in the sun.

the bodies bulbs, waiting for their season to rise.

.

What wars have been faught within our hearts?

What battles won?

What lies beneath? Inside our bellies?

What scars, visible or invisible, do we bear?

What bodies lie within us waiting to rise?

.

Distress

.

the word strips me down to fear.

i scream,

but no one is listening.

my voice is on the wrong frequency.

static crackles back.

.

Pinky promises with you.

my little finger curles in yours.

Answer me when i call.

Dont let me become alone.

Tune into my frequency

.

When i say with urgency, “Dad!” quickly come,

your name is my confidence

that i belong with you

and you with me.

.

From your spot

come running quickly

.

is – is this your spot?

On the watchtower? 

Leaning over into the folds of darkness

squinting to see movement?

Looking for my return?

.

Is this your spot?

.

Bewildered

.

i cannot fathom this sanctuary,

that you desire

in my heart

.

Strengthen my heart

grant me strength

.

Give me desire – any desire

just enough to crawl from the mud and return

.

i have forgotten your arms

i have forgotten your voice

i have forgotten how to want

.

desperation

.

it eats me up

its beyond need

desperation forces me down

and its fingers bruise my neck

.

this is not want, or desire.

this is not dream.

this is destruction

.

consuming me ….will you let it?

.

They are brought to their knees and fall

.

we are told we will shout for joy

we are told that if we keep walking thru the desert we will shed the slave mentality

we are told we are sons and daughters

made for posession and inheritance

sealed

crowned

desired

.

they are brought to their knees and fall

but we.

we rise up and stand firm

.

annoint me

let your truth tumble down upon me

like oil unable to be washed out or washed off

let your joy shake me from the soil and rattle my bones till they all fall apart

.

stubbornness

.

defensiveness

.

remember

accept

mine

my feeble little offers

my broken incomplete prayers

my selfish unwholesome actions

.

denied

.

unnacceptable

.

even i know

even i reject yours

and yours and yours…

why do i think mine are justified?

.

He remembers

He accepts

.

He

.

spotless

chosen and choosing

slain

Accepted

.

His desire will always far outburn mine

His desire will always far outburn yours

.

Know

.

The field is littered with broken burning charriots

Even the horses have become weary

and mouths foaming blood have wandered away…

They are brought to their knees and fall.

But we,

we rise up and stand firm.