I saw this,
Chinese flag,
hanging from a building here in Serbia today…
i didnt know.
id fall in love with you
Serbia.
i saw this flag,
hanging from a building,
and i realized
it was the embassy.
.
Land given in one country
to another country
in exchange for a small piece
of land
In their country…
.
i read about it
as a kid
The cities of refuge.
.
Numbers 35
Deuteronomy 4 and 19
Joshua 20
.
You.
You oh Zion
Lion in the field
You
You are my refuge.
You have come
placed yourself in my land
and given me a property in your land
You
You are my embassy.
You are my city of refuge.
I run to you
I am saved
.
I never considered the meaning before
I didnt even care
Until i was running
i was actually running from you
.
Always better to be dead then to face what i dont want to do
even though you ask me to do it
.
So i told them
the reason for the storm was me
And i told them
take me up
and throw me into the sea
.
now
in the acid of my sin
i am screaming
Save me!
.
Entangled
Overwhelmed
Coiled into
Confronted
.
In distress
Where else can i go?
.
Trapped.
Ensnared.
.
He has chosen this plot of land
my belly.
He answers from inside the whale.
He holds his knees and listens with all of his being to my pitiful little prayers
because i am a child
with monsters under my bed.
.
He listens
.
The whole earth shakes
when He speaks
He opens His mouth
the foundations of the earth tremble
.
to speak would be
an atomic response
.
a subatomic level catastrophy
.
When he speaks my vision gives way
my particles begin to separate
Something is tearing
the sky parts
and its like the clouds form a staircase into my guts
.
So he places his hand over the crevis as He passes by
the cave where i am hidden
.
He whispers
i am kind
i am patient
i am gentle
i am merciful
i am just
I rejoice with truth…
His feet on the rocks are scarred.
.
Even His whisper is like thunder
the whole ground heaves
time itself shatters like a glass inside my chest
and everything
everything becomes visible.
.
He reaches out
and snatches me from where i lie curled away
i dont want to
and i cant
but he snatches me up
He shakes me out of my sleep
.
All the lies fall off me like a shed skin
.
They had almost engulfed me completely
When i fell they instantly took root
locked me to the ground with their powerful grip
i was unable to rise
my feeble attempts to uproot them fell helpless beside me
.
i am to blame
i am to blame
but you
.
You are not to blame
You wink at me
You have a trick up your sleeve
.
a trick
an incantation
a deeper magic
from before the dawn of time,
an agreement
a covenant
a dream
.
i am like You
i have the ability to dream
.
Your trick wasn’t what we expected
You did it all wrong
You gave up
You let go
You left everything
You became what none of us dream of
You drempt outside the box
.
You have rewarded me according to Your lovingkindness
You have kept all the laws for me
You have kept yourself blameless
to make me blameless
You have not turned away
although He turned away from you.
.
Now
blamless
You show me yourself
.
Now
faithful
You show me yourself
.
Now
pure
You show me yourself
.
And when
i am crooked
You show yourself shrewd
.
My haughty eyes
you have humbled
.
My humble soul
You have lifted
.
You keep a place for me at your table
You keep my room ready for me
You teach me how to fight my losing battles
You give me the ability to climb unscalable walls
.
The sword you place in my hand
is your infallable word.
You teach me how to weild it
You speak life over me as i fall asleep
You watch me
thru the watches of the night
.
i am unafraid in the dark
.
Who else
do i have?
Who else
is like this?
Who else
keeps their promises to such scrutinous details?
Who else
has the power to do all these things?
Could you fight Him if you wanted to?
If you think youre so wonderful
why do you think He’d be any less?
.
Bend down
.
Bend
Down
.
Pick a simple blade of grass
And tell me
that He would do any less than you
at your very g** d*** best
.
We are stressing “what ifs”
When all around us the world screams “but God”
.
I can
I can rise
I can fight off the lies
I can scale the wall
I can move the mountains
I can part the sea
I can stay on the mountain,
and if i am a daughter of the king
let fire fall from heaven
and consume all that comes against me
all 50 thousand lies
.
You are my embassy.
The gates claim:
Unfailing kindness here.
