My sleeping mat is flat. Its 4am and I’m laying in my bug net on the floor, listening to the beetles fly around the room. It’s really hot, we have two fans and it’s at least 75 degrees, I’m sweating a lot and I’m laying on a deflated pad. In my head, I’m wishing I was in a bed, preferably my own, with the coolness of air conditioning. It’s at this moment I realize how much I take for granted in the day to day life. Rarely do I wake up in Nampa grateful for my bed and for the fact that I don’t fall asleep to the sound of bugs flying around my head. I open my bible and start reading in Colossians, chapter 4. Towards the end of his letter, Paul writes;
“Devote yourself to prayer, being watchful and thankful. And pray for us too, that God may open a door for our message, that we may be able to proclaim the mystery of the gospel of Christ, for which I am in chains. Pray that I may proclaim it freely as I should. Be wise in the way in the way you act towards outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”
So often my conversations are not full of grace. So often I do not make the most of my conversations with outsiders. Do they know that I love Christ when they talk to me? Can they tell by the way I love that He loves them? With all stripped away, what remains? I hope that one thing is Christ, and this opportunity is helping me to see that He is all I truly need. The simplicity of life here in Siem Reap is one of the greatest gifts I’ve received. I wash dishes after dinner some nights, a young girl at the home washes next to me, her name is Srey Dy. Srey Dy teaches me Khmer phrases and I teach her English. I know how to count and to say, “my name is”, that’s about it. We don’t have the greatest communication but there’s something about just smiling at each other while we wash that is pretty sweet. She pointed at me a few days ago and said, “don’t go to America, I will miss you too much”. Man, the conversations we are able to have are precious as we both realize that in two weeks I’ll be gone, it makes me want to stretch the time and soak in as many dishwashing smiles as I can. Some afternoon we ride bikes down to a little market and buy iced coffee from a lady there. She speaks no English, so it’s a real game we play where I point at the thing I want, and she tries to decipher what exactly I’m asking for. I think we’re regular enough now that she knows what we want, but as I wait for my iced coffee all I can do is smile at her as she laughs at my “order”. I took one of the boys to school on the back of my bike a few days ago and tried to ask questions about what they study and how many children are in his classes. I don’t think he really understood my questions, but the simple joy of sharing a 3-minute bike ride is priceless. Here, my “conversations” look a lot like smiling and nodding, as I try to understand the other person. The question still applies, are my conversations full of grace? Are they pleasing to Him? I pray that through the simple smiles and broken coffee orders, Christ is glorified in me.
My phone recently died, “the machine failed” as the iPhone repairman put it. The Lord is constantly teaching me what I’m relying on other than Him. So now I have a flat sleeping mat and a broken phone, and I’ve never been happier. I’m learning that idols in my life don’t always look like “sin”, they sometimes look like taking too many photos, or scrolling through my Facebook page. My lack of phone has been a huge blessing, and it’s helped me realign my heart with what truly matters. So, as I lie awake at 4am, on a flat pad, listening to the bugs, I rejoice in the simple life. I thank the Lord that He gives me exactly what I need, and He takes away the things I don’t. He’s a good Father and I’m learning more and more to depend on Him alone.
Continue to pray for our English ministry at New Hope for Orphans as well as team health as we have about two weeks left here in Cambodia.
