For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, “Abba! Father!!” The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs- heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him. Romans 8:14-17
We do NOT have an orphan spirit. We have a spirit of SONSHIP. That’s what God wants for us.
A couple weeks ago, I wrote a blog about loving others unconditionally, but this month, God has been showing me that it’s even more important to receive that unconditional love. This has been so important in my spiritual growth that I actually gave a sermon on it to the church we have been a part of here in Rwanda.
The orphan spirit results in a fear of trusting, a fear of rejection and abandonment, and a fear of opening our heart to love which results in taking a defensive posture to others.
Feeling more secure and at rest in Father’s love displaces a lot of that fear. And leads to relationships becoming much more open, real, and meaningful, and we become the community of love that Christ intended for us to be.
The story of the prodigal son told in Luke 15 shows the contrast between the spirit of sonship and the orphan spirit.
Orphans have the mentality of “what can you do for me, not what can I do for you?”
The younger son in the story decides to reject his sonship and cares more about what his father can give him. He asks for his inheritance early, without any thought to his father, and he leaves his home with his father.
Until he remembers the home he has with his father. He decides to return home. And when he does, His father runs to him and embraces him.
And the son finally embraces his sonship.
At the beginning of the story, he had said he would do it his way and pursue the things that would make him feel good and give him a sense of value and significance.
But embracing sonship gave him security in belonging, value, honor, and feeling loved. His father didn’t care about what his son had done. Unconditional love is never based upon the performance of the one receiving it but upon the nature of the one giving it. It was completely based on who the father was.
The older son, on the other hand, was trying to earn an inheritance he already had. He loved his father for what he could for him. He was physically home with his father but not spiritually home which is why he was not happy when his younger brother came home.
Orphan hearts are jealous of anyone who enjoys true love and intimacy.
If we look at Jesus’ life, Jesus focused on being a son first, which revealed the father and His love.
So Jesus said to them, “Truly, truly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of his own accord, but only what he sees the Father doing. For whatever the Father does, that the Son does likewise. For the Father loves the Son and shows him all that he himself is doing. And greater works than these will he show him, so that you may marvel.” John 5:19-20
Jesus was the man He was because of the Father He had.
We must receive the unconditional love as sons and daughters. We can’t actually give it unless we receive it first.
So how do we know if we are a son or an orphan?
The heart of sonship is a heart that has learned to honor all people.
What does it look like to honor others? It’s one of those words and concepts that I’m not sure any of us know what it practically looks like to honor others. Thankfully, our leadership on the World Race has shown us what honor looks like.
Honor says you’re worth it. It gives a person a position of high value and worth. It’s not focused on others faults and weaknesses. Love covers and does not expose others weaknesses.
Honor puts love into action. It chooses to not expose, but to speak words that give grace to the hearer. It chooses to not respond with an unwholesome word or tone. Honor views each person as a precious gift of God’s creation and grants them a position that is worthy of great respect.
Judgment, resentment, anger, sarcasm, criticism, comparisons, favoritism, jealousy, selfishness, and racism are weapons of dishonor used against those who are considered of little value or worth.
Behold, I will send you Elijah the prophet before the great and awesome day of the Lord comes. And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction. Malachi 4:5-6
We must embrace sonship and suffer through the time of training and preparation for maturity or we will not embody the fathering spirit on earth.
Something that loving fathers do is discipline their sons and daughters. Discipline is good.
For the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and chastises every son whom he receives. Hebrew 12:6
So listening to our parents is important. We know how to be a father or mother by knowing how to be a son or daughter. Jesus knew how to be a son.
Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother” (This is the first commandment with a promise), “that it may go well with you and that you may live long in the land.” Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. – Eph 6:1-3
We don’t know if the older son ever received his inheritance. The older son didn’t realize that there is no striving needed, only abiding in the Father’s embrace. He didn’t realize that his value and significance was found in who his father saw him as. His son. The only requirement to receive his inheritance was to be a son. His father just wanted his heart. Not performance. Just his heart.
Growing up, I was the older brother. Even though I considered myself a christian, I resisted receiving the spirit of sonship. It was hard for me to believe I was valued and loved and belonged. I was more focused on works than just receiving the love from the Father. I wasn’t secure in the Father’s love for me.
But now, I receive what the Father said to Jesus,
This is my beloved SON, in whom I am well pleased.
God was pleased with Jesus as His son. He is pleased with us and delights in us.
Jesus knew who he was as son. He knew his full value and worth at all times. That’s how he loved others better than anyone else who has ever walked this earth.
Since Cambodia, I have been seeking God’s heart and seeing His heart as my treasure. But now, more than ever, I see how my heart is His treasure.
We love BECAUSE He FIRST loved us. 1 John 4:19
Whenever we tell Him that we love Him, it’s only because He has said it first. Our response is always, I love you too.
