Where do I even begin? These past few weeks have been such a whirlwind of ups and downs. By that, I mean I have been challenged and pushed to my limits, but also seen the Lord’s faithfulness through it all.
Yesterday, our team and hosts went to a children’s hospital to pray for the kids and parents there. We usually go into 1-2 rooms and give them juice and cookies and talk to them and listen to their stories. Once we were separated into groups I turned the corner and saw a little boy lying in a crib with his mother at his side. He had a cast on one arm and bandages covering his whole other arm. His mother was also covered in bandages on both of her arms. We found out the little boy’s name was Jefferson and the mother’s name was Rebecca. We asked why the boy was there and she answered with her head down. She explained that on Monday he was a victim of a shooting. He was shot two or three times in his arms. She said she was also shot along with a few others. As I looked down and smiled and touched the boy’s leg, he cringed in fear and almost started crying. Rebecca said that he used to be full of joy, laughter and was always friendly with strangers.
This brought tears to my eyes. I was in shock at how this could happen to a little two-year-old boy and his 19-year-old mother. All I could think was.. This boy was shot? Who could do that? And at two years old, he was now traumatized and terrified of people. The laughter and joy from the Lord was now replaced by fear of this world.
No, life is not fair. How can it be that little children are victims of abuse, that others feel they need to sell their body, that there are shootings at elementary schools and bombings at events? My heart aches for all of these things. I am still trying to process all of what I saw yesterday. Not just the physical band aids around Jefferson’s body, but the emotional scars of what just happened to him. To look down at a once bubbly child and instead see pain and hurt.. But in that moment of sadness and distress, I prayed. I prayed harder than before for this child and his family. Why? Because I know God is greater than all of this. He can turn horrible things and experiences into good and beautiful things. He uses us as vessels for His glory. He brought me there for a reason and that was to bring a light to this dark situation.
Who is going to intercede for Jefferson if we don’t? Who is going to intercede for the prostitutes and those being trafficked if we don’t? Yes, I am being stretched and pulled in uncomfortable ways here. Yes, at times I just wish I could be alone. It is hard living in community. But in these times of trials and growth, I can see my faith being renewed and strengthened each day. I can feel my heart soften and break for the brokenness of this world. For the country of El Salvador. For the children here who have only known a life of abuse and being affiliated with gangs. I know that by being here in this very moment and going out to pray for all of these sons and daughters of God, I am content. All of my worries and fears of the future are washing away. I do not know what else could bring me more happiness and joy than bringing Jesus to the Nations.
Please lift up a prayer for Jefferson and his family. I know that God is closer than I could ever imagine and is holding his little hands through this all. He is going to restore Jefferson to his fullest and bring joy back into his life – I just know it. Let’s rejoice in how good and faithful and merciful our God is! I have seen what He has done in my life and I know what amazing things can be done for the people of El Salvador… and for you.
Teach me your way, Lord, that I may rely on your faithfulness;
give me an undivided heart, that I may fear your name.
I will praise you, Lord my God, with all my heart;
I will glorify your name forever.
For great is your love toward me;
you have delivered me from the depths, from the realm of the dead.
-Psalms 86:11-13
