The seven of us were thrown together after 4 days of crazy food, race simulation situations, and tenting in the rain. On September 5, 2012 we married each other.
I remember sitting in a Chicago hotel room sharing our hardest moment in life. Nothing like digging deep right from the start, eh? This is when I learned about the concept of “scuba diving” with people.
Since then I have lived with these same people, plus an added member in month 4. It’s amazing what you learn while living in community. It’s like being married. We sleep in the same room, work together, cook together, eat together, brush our teeth together, share a bathroom, do each other’s laundry, and share pretty much everything. Actually, I think living in community on the race is a greater commitment than marriage.
We have shared our deepest secrets with each other. We have had to confront offenses and hurt feelings. We communicate to each other the state of our hearts on a weekly basis. We also have never laughed harder or more. We have a number of Sweet Aroma inside jokes. We have memorized the articles of clothing and gear each person has brought along. We know who drinks coffee and who doesn’t, who likes what foods and who will not touch that banana. We fart and burp freely around each other. All boundaries have been plowed in the last 8 months.
Coming on the race has been the best marriage prep course I could have applied for. I’ve had to learn to check the way I communicate with others, I’ve had to learn how to submit to different ideas, I’ve had to choose to love someone when it would have been easier to walk away.
When I started this race my world was run by me. I lived alone, I was the authority in my classroom, I could come and go as I pleased. On the race there are always other people to consider. Just like in a marriage, it’s no longer just about you. When a teammate is hurting you can’t just walk away or wait for someone else to be there for them. Everyone is part of the team and everyone needs to be supportive. Just like in a marriage, you need to be considerate of your spouse’s feelings.
When I am married and there is only one other person who will be doing life with me I think I’ll feel relived to only have one other person in this marriage. Of course once we have kids team Sweet Aroma will be back in full force.
