“How is it to be home?”
WEIRD.
That is the only word that seems to fit as an appropriate response to the question that I have been asked countless times over the past week and a half I’ve been home.
It’s weird to have a washer/dryer handy 24/7. A free one at that.
It’s weird to use a towel once instead of for 2 weeks before washing it.
It’s weird to not have to wash all your dishes by hand.
It’s weird being alone, not surrounded by a community of believers 24/7.
It’s weird having excellent WiFi and being able to communicate with someone with no hassle all the time.
It’s weird having a plethora of clothes, clothes you haven’t seen in so long that you consider them brand new.
It’s weird being gone so long that children have been born and weddings are being planned.
Being home hasn’t been bad or good it’s just…different.
There have been really amazing times. Times I’ve been able to see my incredible family and friends that I haven’t seen in so long and that love me so well. Times where people have asked me such incredibly intentional questions and I am just so moved by their interest in my life and what God has done. I have really enjoyed wearing my sweatpants on a regular basis, being able to watch movies with my sisters and laugh at each other, and wake up each morning with freshly brewed coffee and Jesus.
There have also been really challenging times. Times when I feel like I’m suffocating being in a culture that is driven by so many things that doesn’t align with the life I lived for a year-driven by money, career, success, sex, alcohol, etc. Times where I am taken aback by the harshness of people and the language that is used. Times when I feel like know one in the world can relate to me. Times when I get distracted so easily by technology and social media.
And something I’ve also learned is that America is also weirded out by me.
It’s weird that I want to go back into long-term missions.
It’s weird that I was ok with not having comforts for a year.
It’s weird that I didn’t mind not dating AT ALL for a year.
It’s weird that it wouldn’t bother me to live off of support money once again and not make an actual income.
It’s weird that tap water tastes just great to me.
It’s weird that I still wear shirts more than once(according to my sister Anna)
It’s weird that me being back safe does not matter to me in the slightest.
And although it looks as though I will be in the States for a season(length of time unbeknownst to me), I truly wish to continue this awkward relationship with America.
We on X-Squad used the saying “Weird Them Out” , and not because we made goofy ridiculous dance videos (that was just for fun), but because of the counter-cultural lifestyle we led. Time and time again we’ve said no to the world and yes to Jesus. Don’t worry I will adjust accordingly. After all, I’m not going to let a good hot shower and good smelling clothes go to waste.
Stay Weird America, I’ll Do The Same.
“Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moths and vermin do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
-Matthew 6:19-21
I also want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who has supported me so well over the past year, whether it was financially, prayerfully, emotionally, etc. It has meant the world to me, both on the race and now that I have returned. I would absolutely LOVE to talk to anyone about my trip, and so please email me ([email protected]) if you want to catch up either in person(The WR has only increased my love of coffee) or over the phone. God Bless You ALL.
-Cara
