The day before I left for training camp I had a wonderful evening with two of my very dearest friends ice skating.. That was the beginning of what would rock my socks off. As the night ended in laughter and nothing, but pure.. joy I looked back at the skating rink thinking, "WOW, my life couldn't get any better, and nothing could steal my joy from me if it wanted to.." In a split second, all of that was tested. As I approached the car, I had this sudden feeling of uneasiness. The car was broken into and the only things stolen out of it were my things and my friend Mike's overnight bag…
As you can guess, none other than Satan himself had come to steal my joy… Big mistake mister!!! I frantically looked for my things and the realization of my fear came to life as I searched… none of the things I needed for camp were there. I stood at a loss for words for what to do without my things, which were all things that had been loaned to me for camp to try out. I remember standing there at the door saying out loud , "Lord, what do I do?" At this moment, I'm sure the Holy Spirit took over because I just hit my knees in full surrender praying for His peace to come back and for me to catch the joy again that I had just had only 3 minutes prior. I prayed for what seemed like forever and then stood up and laughed and smiled so big because at that very moment, I realized I was exactly were I needed to be and that I was right smack dab in the middle of God's will for me.
You see the one thing Satan doesn't want is for anyone to be doing what God has called them to do. Why, you might ask.. well, because then you start this journey of bringing God all kinds of glory. The devil tries his hardest to see that that never happens… Guess what satan.. YOU LOSE!!! I have my peace and my joy and you will never take that away! I entered the gym at training camp to Erin ,my mobilizer, giving me a much needed hug. She then reaches behind a table and pulls out a bag filled with things put together for me by my beautiful Wsquad.
At training camp we learned to let God in to break the walls the world has done such a good job of building up. I went in with an open heart ready to receive. The first few days were honestly just blah.. I felt nothing and I was trying so hard. I was about at the point where I wanted to give up turn around give back the things that my squad put together and give into satan, thinking that this was all nonsense and I couldn't be used due to the fact that I could even tap into these emotions that I so desperatly wanted to tap into..
It wasn't until one beautiful night of worship that we were faced with a really strange challenge. We had to look into the eyes of a fellow squadmate and sing the lyrics "Oh, how He loves you.." As i looked into Christina's eyes singing the lyrics while she sang them back to me, my soul opened up and I felt as if God himself was singing to me. Finally, my emotions were back!! To those of you who know me, I'm a big cry baby.. I can cry while watching The Fresh Prince of Bel Air.. crazy, I know..
God showed up and he broke me into a million little pieces when I finally let go of things of the past, grieved, and let Him know how I felt. I let Him know that I was ready to give myself up. In one moment, He came to me and sang that He loves me through the voice of Christina.
At that moment, the things that were stolen weren't important. The things of this world weren't important. The fear that I'll never be good enough to let Him love me weren't important.The thoughts that I cant fulfill His will or calling for my life weren't important. In that moment, I knew I wasn't on the pursuit of something untouchable. I was sitting right in front of it letting it overwhelm my soul!
So here is my question to you.. Have you let satan steal your joy? Do you feel like you are not good enough? Do you feel like no one will ever love you??? Let me let you in on a little secret. God sent his Son to be a sacrifice for us. To bridge the gap.. To set us free! Satan has us in chains.. chains that need to fall off. So will you let Him love you?
xoxo
Candace
