I think most of you who know me, know that I am a person of passion. Passion about many things, but with that passion comes the need for self control. I have so many thoughts, ideas and things going on inside my head that get me pumped up. There is many things I just want to change, and many that I want to speak boldly about. Unfortunately, sometimes the fact that I am one person with only so much influence usually gets me defeated pretty quickly.
However, In the last few weeks, as I have told so many people about this amazing adventure that God has for me, those passions and things on my mind have been swelling up inside of me. A friend recently reminded me that my blog is a place for me to be honest and real, and it’s a place for me say things that I’m learning even if others don’t agree.
When I first found out about the race, let me tell you, I was pumped. I wrote in an old journal, “one day I will do the race, and I can’t wait.” Now I am! My reasons for wanting to go were, and still are numerous: getting to see the world that God created, to love people whom are completely different from me, to help people in a small way, to hold hands with strangers and have a bunch of new neighbors, to learn about myself, and of course to share the life of Jesus with many.
Honestly, when I describe the world race and hear people reply with “Oh… so your going to be a missionary,” my stomach kinda turns. Or when I hear “It’s so great that you are going to go and help people,” I want to tell them how it's so much more. I guess the issue is that both are true but neither response seems right.
In scripture we are told to go and share the name of Jesus, but we also see Jesus as a helper. We see him sharing meals, providing, healing, and wanting to spend time with people – just know them. This shows me that we have a God who deeply cares, and wants us to care as well. We must share more than his name. We must share his life.
I guess the truth is I don’t desire to be called a missionary because it’s a term that the American church has pridefully morphed into something that I don’t quite like. On the other hand, I’m not just helping people. We can do all the good in the world but if we do it apart for the Lord then it’s all vanity.
I guess you can just say that I am living.
On a journey, but following Him.
A sojourner.
