We got to China about a week ago.
We flew in from Kathmandu, Nepal where my team was last month.
Upon arriving, we played worship music on the side of the busy train station.
Talked to the few people who could actually speak English about Jesus.
Spent a couple nights in a hotel while waiting for our train.
Went to starbucks.
Went to Pizza Hut.
Went to H&M.
And then, we sat on a train for 36 hours.
Always moving.
Nothing stays the same.
At this point one would probably think I'm use to it.
It has been nearly 10 months.
I mean, I've fallen off the grid to most of my friends back home. I don't remember what books are on my bookshelf or what my dogs sound like when they are excited. I don't remember the way that my carpet feels against my skin as I pass out on to it after going running. I have forgot what it feels like to sing Mumford songs while driving down Texas roads. I have forgotten the things that were once so familiar and I have replaced familiarity with new things. The feel of my pack against my back. The comfort of my 12 shirts and 5 pairs of pants. The sound of my teammates voices.
But even in those things nothing is constant. My worn and torn clothing get replaced. My pack gets heavier and lighter and heavier again. We change. In fact, I think I have a few more wrinkles than I did in January.
Every month I say goodbye to people I have come to admire, respect… dare I say, love.
I get to a new "home"
I make new friends.
I do new things.
Eat new food.
It's exciting, to live with this much dependence.
To find God as your only constant amidst so many things changing.
But honestly it is really hard. I do miss home.
I am getting really exhausted.
I keep thinking in 8 weeks I will feel more stable.
I will be happier.
But I don't think it's true anymore.
Because home is found in God and not where you are.
It's possible to feel constant amidst all this chaos.
It's possible to be intentional with pouring out and still be filled.
It's possible to want for yourself the things that are hard, if they do make you more like Christ.
I don't remember much of what was.. but maybe that's okay.
Because now I can focus on what is.
This month, China.
Next month I can focus on The Philippines
and In 8 weeks I can focus on Texas.
and I can thank God that I have people to hold my hand
and love me even though we speak a different language.
And I can live life like I want what I have
and not what I'm going to have one day.
God knows what I need.
And this is what I need.
Please be praying for c-squad.
We are excited for the two months that we still have out here, but could use a boost.
Thanks and much love!
