An excerpt from my journal
The beauty of this place still takes my breath away. I get to wake up and see this. Sometimes, I love to look at the different trees and the rocks and the sky and the mountains and just marvel at the way they exist. In all their majesty. And sometimes I walk around almost giving compliments, in my mind, to the the creation – “Wow, your so beautiful.” Then I realize how absolutely silly I sound because the mountains did not form themselves. I suppose the praise is more fitting when directed towards the God that created them. I suppose that makes more sense.
And as I sit here, with the dirt under my feet and the wind playing with my hair, I realize that my life is such a small part of something that is so big.
I am so finite.
So imperfect.
I realize how small I am, more now than ever before, and I’m blow away by the vastness of my God. By the fullness of His being. And I feel so unworthy of knowing Him. Of being His child.
It’s all so perfect sounding.
I get to be in a relationship with God.
Father. Son. Holy Spirit.
Talk about intimacy.
Maybe that’s the kind of perfect we should be longing for. Not a perfection that so many voices are telling us to lust after. Instead, we should find perfection in the simple and yet complex reality that we too are created – made by a perfect God. With a purpose. To love and be loved.
It’s kinda perfect if you think about it.
No, it’s not always easy. Things here, despite the beauty, are still real. They are still difficult. They are still painful. But I think I’m seeing pain in a new way. Pain is our universal language that draws us to the One who heals. The One who holds us in His arms and loves us as only He can.
I don’t know, maybe these are the ramblings of an girl that is trying to grasp something she never will. Or maybe I just think we are missing out on the fullness of His love in our lust for a more plastic form of perfection.
Who knows.
But I have been given a good and perfect gift
of intimacy with the father, and voice that whispers
“I love you.”
And it's enough
More than enough
It's perfect.
