Hey y’all my momma wrote me a letter. It’s keeping me going. So hopefully it does the same for you. Love you guys!
“Jesus slept during a storm. When you put yours r full trust in him…you can too.”
Being a Southern California family, I don’t think we understand what it would be like to be in a full-blown storm. It seems as though it would be crazy to sleep and be calm during a time like this, but we read in scripture that Jesus slept, and his friends were fearful. (Matthew 8:24)
When my brave girl signed up for this Gap year, I was ready. Ready for her to go and do great things for the Kingdom of God. I was excited to see how He would change her and show himself to her in new and amazing ways. I knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but I knew it was right and good. Unfortunately, I had no idea how challenging this season would truly be.
Camille’s presence in our home has been greatly missed. She is loud, she is present; she is fun and she is feisty. I even miss her friends more than I thought I would. They filled our house with laughter and ate our food freely.
Having Camille be so far away became harder than I had imagined it would be when the storms of life hit our family once again in the month of December. We lost my firstborn grandson Malachi, Camille’s nephew, at 5 days old. Just 10 days later, we lost our dearest friend, Uncle Greg, to a year long battle with cancer. In seasons of grief, I personally want everyone home and close, and now that is just not an option. Camille is on the other side of the world, grieving these losses away from all of us. When I get the phone calls of her crackling, aching voice, I dig deep and let her know that she is strong. I remind her of who she is and what God has for her future. To be honest, I’m encouraging myself as I speak to her most days. My momma’s heart is tender for her, but I have to see the bigger picture for her and not just the present moment. Honestly, it has sometimes felt like Jesus is asleep during our storm, when it’s dark and quiet, and fear creeps in. But, I know the truth is that He is in full control of our children, whether they are under our roof, off to college, married with their own families, or even lost in sadness and pain. He is faithful when we are not physically there. He is faithful when we make mistakes as parents. He is faithful in it all.
I’ve seen such growth in my girl. I’ve seen her recover from days of being ill with who-knows-what-kind-of bug. I’ve seen her push through some really hard times of deep sadness and feeling alone in it. But, most of all, she is becoming unrecognizable to me in the best way possible. Her laugh has not changed, and her cheeky bantering with her siblings remains, but her heart, it’s broken for people- people she never would have known, but for the sake of the Gospel.
Did it in fact feel like Jesus was sleeping during the month of December while my family was in what felt like a storm that was completely drowning us? Yes! BUT, my hope was and is still in him, to bring us through it, to trust in His plan, and to hold on to the only stable pillar in our lives. Writing these words makes it sound like we are all dried off and living in the grace of what an after- storm feels like, but we are not. We are truly still feeling the effects of loss and grief, yet knowing our trust and hope is in clinging to Jesus, the one who calms the storms. He has you Camille Tyree. He’s faithful, and he’s good, and you are #tyreestrong.
