For many years I have said that I am not a “kid person” – I love to be with children, but I also love to give them back. I would prefer to be “Fun Aunt Cameron” than “Mom.” Which is why the words spoken to me by a sound man of God – that he saw me in the Spirit surrounded by children – brought me great surprise and uncertainty about my future (as if the future is ever certain, right?).
However, since those words were spoken over me two months ago in Swaziland, my heart for children has grown deeply and in each location my team has traveled, I find myself consistently drawn to be with children. One day in Mozambique, I truly saw those words come to life, as I struggled to even move on the bamboo mat I sat upon because of the large gathering of children surrounding me. Most days it seemed I could not take a step without hearing my name called by some child wanting to play soccer, play hand games, or sit and play with my unusually-colored hair. If one child’s photo was taken, every other child would surround me saying “Shoot me! Shoot me!” If one child was swung in the air, fifteen or so other children would throw their hands in the air waiting for their turn. One teammate even noted that the two members of the team who are “kid people” (Christie and Haley) spent most of their time doing other ministry, while the two non-“kid people” (Pam and I) were the ones whom the children of Mutarara were drawn to.
I am still baffled by this. I have no special skills with children. I have no creative activities to teach them about the Bible, I have very few game ideas, and I am certainly not a teacher. What could I possibly offer to these precious children?
I have love. I have time. I have a warm embrace. I have laughter. I have tears. And Mutarara required a lot of love. There were so many days where my patience was tested, where I considered changing my name so I didn’t have to hear it called anymore, when I wished more than anything that I could be sitting in a café with air-conditioning, a good book and a cappuccino.
But in these times in Mozambique, I discovered what it meant that the joy of the Lord is my strength. The God who created the sky, the seas, the mountains, and the valleys also created these young ones. His heart delights in their every move. It is His joy to bring smiles to their faces and dancing to their feet. The joy of the Father and the overwhelming love He has for me gave me the strength to continue to sit, to play, to give of myself, when I believed I had nothing to offer.
I find often that when I think I have nothing, the Lord shows me how much I truly have and how much I have to give. What I do not have (compassion, understanding, energy, etc) He will provide just at the proper time. But He asks me not to hold onto these gifts – they are given in order to be given away, to show others His gracious love.
In whatever ministry, in whatever work; whether you are a believer or not; whether you know your calling and purpose or not – you have something to offer to those around you. The Lord has purposes for each of us, and He has intertwined each of our lives and our talents and giftings to work with one another. So whatever you have, give it away.
Where the heart tends toward mercy
And the soul leans toward love
And my heart and soul in my dream of life loves you
