Well, here I am!! I have been back in the States for a little over a month now and have put off this post for a long time. Mostly, because I do not know what to say. I do not know how to sum up this year, how to explain all that God did, put into words how good He is, and how my life is forever changed. There are no words and too many words!!
I’ll start by just saying my heart is all over the place. I was really excited when I got home to be back in a familiar place with people who know me so well, but at the same time I felt like I was just going into another month of ministry. The few weeks after coming home were filled with reconnection and some great conversations with family and friends. Seeing those I love so dearly has filled my heart with joy, but at the same time I felt that I was not getting enough time to just be with the Lord. Not enough time to simply sit and reflect what this past year has been. On top of that I was feeling overwhelmed by the mass overload of EVERYTHING that we have in America! My heart was broken as I sat in a Boston café and saw those around me chasing after fake identities and individualism. It was again broken as I went back to an American megachurch and longed to be back in a remote village where all the people had was a deep deep need for the Lord. They knew the beauty of God’s glory because they did not have man made things to cover it up. I was confused as I walked through Walmart and saw fifty different brands and flavors of barbecue sauce. And again as I looked through my closet and was reminded of the fact that I survived and sometimes loved only having five shirts to wear for a whole year. Needless to say it has been a joy to be home, but it has not been easy. I have new eyes and I see things in a completely different light.
About two weeks ago, the last week of September, my squad met back in Georgia for a final debrief/conference (still don’t know what to call it!) at the Adventures in Missions headquarters. I got to hangout with the friends I have been with 24/7 this past year. It was good. We sat through sessions, processed through some of the weird things we were experiencing being back in the States, and worshipped a lot. This time was good and gave me a chance to understand how I was feeling, what the Lord was and is doing, and how the enemy had been speaking lies into me since I had been home.
The race was the longest year of my life and the shortest. My heart is all over the place!!! It is in Chile with the young girls who had come out of the orphanage; it is with the man at the park in Argentina who cried as he said he wanted to accept Christ; it is in the Bolivian Amazon hills; it is connected to the lives in Cambodia who we shared the gospel with; it is with the precious children at Hope Home in Thailand; it is in the Lords provision and relationships that were made in Serbia; it is with the the two ladies in Romania who accepted Christ as their Lord and Savior; it is with Emy, Val, and Babadonka in Bulgaria; It is all throughout the Ethiopian villages as we shared the gospel with the Oroma Karrayu people group; It is with those that still grieve the lost of their loved ones from the Rwandan genocide; and it is in all the friends that we made in Uganda.
Through this past year, the Lord showed me how to walk in the Spirit. How to listen to His voice and do what He says. He showed me the value in living with a community. From my team I learned the imperishable value of the body of Christ coming together to do the mission. This past year I saw brokenness and poverty like never before. I learned the power of prayer as my team would come together every morning. I got to share the gospel with people who had never heard of Christ and with people who have grown up in cultures where all they know is Buddhism, idol worship, or a false representation of the gospel. By living out the mission I grew in tremendous ways. As I shared my testimony and brought light to things I had been holding on to I was able to find my true identity in Christ. I saw glimpses of God’s glory all over the Earth. I saw beautiful cultures around the world. God brought revelation to my eyes as I met God’s Kingdom around the world. My eyes have seen the world and the beauty of so many different places. He showed me his love in indescribable ways. I began to love the place of sacrifice and simplicity because it was in those remote Ethiopian and Bolivian villages that I felt more of the Lords presence; away from materialism and the access to everything. Throughout this year, I fell more in love with God, His mission, His glory, and His people than ever before and it is why my life will never be the same.
As I am back in the States, I am so so grateful and thankful for the freedom and access that we have here, but so many parts of me long to be back riding a bike in Cambodia, conversing during an Ethiopian coffee ceremony, or hiking through the Amazon to visit a remote village. The eyes of my heart have changed. I love America, but I love the Ugandan villages just as much. I see the importance of God’s hand in each country even though it looks different. I see the Kingdom all around the world working together to fulfill the great commission and fill the Earth with His glory!
To all of those who have supported me – Thank you so so much for all of the support. For the prayers, encouraging words, and financial support. You are just as much a part of what God did throughout this year as anybody. Thank you. I pray that the Lord has spoken to you throughout this journey. That He has shown you new parts of who He is and has made you fall more in love with Him throughout this year.
…Stay tuned to see what is next!!!!!….
xoxox
here are some pictures from throughout the year…
PC: Jen Olsen
Serbian concentration camp
PC: Jen Olsen
A SQUAD FOREVER!!
