I’m not one for much of commitments. Some days I wish I were, other days-most days the thought of real commitment sounds like heavy irrevocable chains for my adventure seeking, spontaneity loving self.
Truth be told God’s recently pulling back layers of the onion, that is me, and well I hate to say it, but I don’t exactly have a healthy fear of commitment. I just out right fear it. ew.
The revealing of this layer left me distraught for a good minute. But I’ll spare you the ramble that Lord got an earfull of and skip to the beautiful part. To the part after I left my mess at His very feet. To where He brought me back to truth and reminded me of the greatest commitment my life could ever be a part of. Relationship with Him.
If I could say yes to Him, if I could commit my entire life into His hands, there isn’t anything I can’t commit to.
He’s been speaking to me a lot recently about how I’m also a powerful person. And powerful people make powerful decisions. See we’re in a relationship with God. We’re not confined to the rules of a religion. We trust Him and He trusts us. So sometimes we’re given choices. Between colleges, between career paths, between moving or not moving…ect. We get to decide what we choose.
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think we get to choose everything in life, but when we’re deeply abiding in the Father, completely submerged in His presence…well i think we’re alright to make a choice or two.
Then…we get to choose what we have chosen.
I fully believe that when we make choices in life, with a heart to honor and glorify the Lord, that they are filled with excitement and joy; and that He is totally in them.
It doesn’t mean that everything we decide to choose will be an easy yes. We may choose things with certain knowledge that it’ll be a challenge. But I think that’s good. Because where’s the growth if we never face the trials?
I’m getting off point…
What I’ve realized is that when we choose something, when we commit to anything or even anyone, in life – the same strength and the same joy God gave us the day of our initial “yes” He can give to us everyday after.
Because we have to continue to choose whatever it is…everyday for the span of that commitment. If we don’t…we’ll be missing out on SO much of the abundance we’re promised.
Commiting to squad lead for 9 months, after having been on “the field” for 19 months already…was a hard choice. But what a transformational chapter of life this has been. Some days have been solid. A lot have been full of beautiful moments and conversations that have changed me for good. Other days I’ve prayed for the mere strength just to get through it.
But I don’t pray that anymore. And I’ll never pray to “just get through” anything ever again. Now I pray for not just the strength, but the desire, the passion, and the joy to choose what I’ve (already) chosen again. And you know what, God is ridiculously faithful to that prayer.
So that’s the beautiful part. I am – in fact a person of commitment. a person who doesn’t fear it but actually enjoys it. Because there’s always more of the Lord when we run out of ourselves. and He shows up in those commitments I’ve made and pours out far more than I ever could of myself.
The Lord sustains the choices we make for His name alone. Because our choices have the power to bring kingdom, and God will always be faithful in that business.
