Chirps and croaks echoing back and forth, the chatter of fast forming friends and the dark of the night singing me asleep. The hot air clings to my skin as the clouds masquerade the moon. Another night done, another dawn to come.
Georgia. Oh Georgia, the things you do to me.
You keep calling me out to you, just to unleash the floodgates of heaven on me.
This time you did not hold back. You lavished me with your love and affection. You created a space for me to be authentically me, cleansing me of my doubts and misconceptions. You provided for me before I could even ask. You gifted me with a new amazing family. You have outdone yourself once again.
One of the major things I was worried about going into this trip was the people. The locations, the ministry, and the adventure I could do. However the people, the community, was out of my control. Even though I felt divinely appointed to be on this squad, it did not mean I was without trepidation moving forward.
Christian communities always make me nervous. I really never feel like I can be myself around them. There is always this damp blanket shrouded over me, that somehow they would judge me for my beliefs, for my past, and for my non-perfect Christian appearance.
There was a tension going into the first few days, how much do I be myself, how much do I share, how much do I allow my heart to fall in love with a group of people.
Once again, God came through in major ways.
My squad was full of real people. People who want to be authentic, people who have damaged pasts, people who just want to experience a real God, and people who want to love on each other.
As I got to know these beautiful individuals, and listened to their stories the more similarities then differences I found between them and myself. Many of them felt burned by the Church, many of them felt betrayed by their closest friends, and many of them just wanted something more then the status quo. This was a group I could be a part of.
It took me longer then most to get vulnerable. But when I finally did, after being poked and prodded by numerous members of my squad, they accepted me with open arms. They genuinely loved who I was, and wanted me to be there.
The last day of training camp was the hardest. After 9 days of being physically, emotionally, and spiritually drained trying to not fall asleep during session became the hardest thing I had done all week. Come the lunch break I opted instead of eating for some alone time. I did not tell anyone what I was doing; I blended into the crowd and disappeared. I ended up following a path into the woods, away from everyone. It was there I fell into a deep sleep on the red Georgia clay. I woke up maybe an hour later and began to meander my way back towards civilization. As I emerged from the woods onto our campsite I was greeted with elation and enthusiasm.
“Caleb, where have you been?”
“Caleb, we have been looking for you”
“Caleb, you have to be at the Training Center at 1:30”
“Caleb, the leaders have something to tell you”
“Caleb, we were worried about you”
“Caleb, you got the storyteller position!”
The time was 1:15 and I have never felt more loved by a group of people. As I made my way to the training center, I could hear people yelling, “I found Caleb!” I could not help but smile to myself. These people really did like me, care for me, and were worried about me.
And good thing too…because they are going to be stuck with me for the next 11 months, and probably the rest of the their lives. I can already feel myself becoming a better person because of their love.
I still need to raise money so I can launch in October. If you would partner with me I would greatly appreciate your support, your love, and your prayers. I cannot do any of this without you. Just as these new 36 people are my family, you too are my family. I pray that you experienced the type of love and acceptance that I have experienced through Training Camp.
It is going to be a crazy beautiful year.
