“Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.”
-C. S. Lewis
I HAVE FAILED on the World Race, but I have learned more about myself every time I got back up. Within the contents of this blog I hope to redefine our thoughts on “failure.” And within the heart of the blog I hope to encourage those who are in the midst of failure to not give up, but to get up and run even harder than before. God has taught me some of the most important lessons in my life within the storm that we call “failure.”
“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up”
-Galatians 6:9
I want to talk about two different ways that I have failed. First, I have sinned. I know that you are not supposed to sin on mission trips and that missionaries are supposed to be superhuman. At least that’s what I thought growing up. I would see all of these people who would travel to the darkest parts of the world, carrying with them the light of God. They were willing to give up all that they had in order to serve others in love. That had to be the pinnacle of holiness. Going into the Race I had the misconception that I would be free from all the temptations I faced at home, and I don’t mean that I just believed I wouldn’t hear “My Girl” for a year. I thought that surely being taken out of the environment that offered all of these temptations while devoting a year of my life to missions meant that my sinful nature would simply vanish into thin air the instant I got on my first plane. Man, was I stupid. Not only did those temptations remain, but at times they were magnified! The immediate, but fleeting comfort that sin provides seemed more enticing as I got more and more uncomfortable. Without the constant sex appeal the American media pumps into our brains, I lowered my guards against lust. I became less desensitized, which in turn made me lazier in my diligence to avoid such things. Or I would justify my sin much easier. “I’m tired, so it’s okay if I get super frustrated at my teammates.” Even though I am walking with the light of Christ, my flesh leads me to play in the shadows…
However, that is NOT the end of the story. Every time I have sinned, every time I have rebelled, every time I have messed up was followed by another day to glorify the Lord through His service. His mercies are new every day (Lamentations 3:23). If God wanted me to stop proclaiming the Gospel because I am imperfect then I would die after my sinful act, yet he keeps me alive. It is my purpose in life to glorify God. He knows I will fall. We fall so that he may pick us up. In our weakness, His strength is made perfect (2 Cor. 12:9). Am I offering an excuse to use our “freedom in Christ” to sin as much as we can because we know that we are forgiven? By no means (Romans 6:1)! Once we sin, we have only to look towards Christ for our hope. I have heard it said that “God lets us hit rock bottom, so that we see that he is the rock at the bottom.” If we keep Christ as our foundation then when we fail, when the storm hits, we will be able to withstand. People workout to failure. They do as many reps as possible until they literally cannot do anymore. They aim to fail. When they do this the goal is that their muscles will eventually repair themselves to be even stronger than before. That is how failure can work in our lives. We can quit every time we sin, or we can put even more faith in God to get us through and to raise us up, building our faith.
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
-Thomas A. Edison
Another sense of failure I have faced on the Race has come in the context of logistics work. Being part of the Squad’s Logistics Team has brought me face to face with failure almost daily. As a Logistics Coordinator, our duty is to arrange travel for the squad, obtain squad visas, plan debriefs, and many other miscellaneous endeavors that come up during the course of our travels. The job comes with a lot of responsibility and a lot of frustration. We have adopted the phrase “Best job I ever had,” inspired by the movie Fury, whenever something goes wrong in replacement of saying something less holy. That phrase has rolled off our lips many times. There has never been a time in logistics when I set out to accomplish a task and everything worked out the first try, BUT it has always worked out. I have reminded myself many times of the Edison quote listed above. I have found 10,000 ways to not travel, and through that I have become very proficient at traveling. With a mixture of the sovereignty of God and persistence nothing has fallen through in the end. Sometimes, it takes until the last minute for everything to fall into place and sometimes we just keep at it, watching the plan unfold as we go. But God always provides and he rewards our persistence. During our first logistics task (before we had even left America) my partner, Lacie, and I typed in the entire squad’s information (Names, gender, nationality, birth date, passport number) at least 6 times before the website would allow us to book flights. It was frustrating, we wanted to quit, we wanted to throw the computer through the wall (well at least I did), but everything worked out and we had our flights to Bangkok. I am not complaining or trying to show how tough our job is, rather I want to celebrate the lessons I have learned through facing failure time and time again. I have learned patience (which I really needed to learn), I have learned persistence, and I have learned resilience. I have loved every minute of logistics. It is like a strategy game which is very hard, yet you feel extremely accomplished when you succeed.
Do not shy away from failure, but RUN away from quitting. Learn from your mistakes and celebrate your victories. God’s plan is not that you may get everything right, but that you learn to trust Him when you fall. As Adam Savage from Mythbusers so eloquently puts it, “Failure is ALWAYS an option.”
Attached below is an incredible video by pastor John Piper as he looks at how to rise after we sin through the context of Micah 7:7-9. Also, a video clip from Batman Begins when Alfred makes us all cry. Please, take a few minutes to watch…
