Last night I watched fireworks over the river in Oriental, North Carolina. As I watched them snap, crackle and pop above me, nostalgia filled the air. A year ago I celebrated Independence Day in Washington, DC, bubbling over with a nervous excitement at the journey ahead of me. July 7th last year, I stepped off of a plane in Dublin, Ireland, beginning the adventure of a lifetime. And now I’m back. It’s crazy to think how much happened, how much changed, and how much stayed the same in that year. We came and went, and the world continued on.
For me, this last year was huge. It changed everything. The things I saw and experienced rocked me and forever affected my perspective. But as I settle into the reality of reentry here in America, it seems like the year really wasn’t all that different than any other year. Since getting home, that has been a struggle. For me, the last 12 months were incredible; for the guy next door, they seemed to be nothing special. At first, I didn’t know what to do with that. It frustrated me. Home has, as of late, felt much smaller than it used to feel; after about a month here, I wondered if maybe I should just leave and move on to the next place for the next month. That sounds kind of great to me, but I know that it wouldn't actually be fulfilling; living that way would really be a never-ending wild goose chase for significance. No, God has something for me in this new uncomfortable place. Fireworks are great because they cause us to feel and reflect, and as I let myself feel all of these struggles, frustrations, joys, and celebrations, something clicked inside me and I found a new joy in this new beginning.
See, I think that our significance is in our insignificance. The most incredible part of this year was that it was just another year that became something more. Think of your heroes. For me, some of those names meant nothing to me three years ago. Heidi and Rolland Baker, the founders of IRIS ministries, have planted countless churches across southern Africa, have led millions of people to the loving arms of the Father, have adopted thousands of children who are orphans no longer, and have seen God do miracles that would blow you away. And yet, I’d never heard of them. Their names meant nothing to me. They were raising the dead in Mozambique and I was having life as normal. Last december, I went to Mozambique and I worked at an IRIS base. The kids at that base are the fruit of the Baker’s faithfulness, and yet none of the kids had ever heard of them. It seemed weird to me at the time, but I realize that the value of what we do isn’t based in who hasn’t heard of us, it rests in who has.
For the people that I encountered this year, the year was significant. I may not have changed the world, but I saw Jesus change a lot of lives the world over. He saved, healed, delivered, encouraged, taught, transformed, blessed and loved people through me in at least 22 nations. Kenya may not look all that different, but I know that the whole world is different for the kids at Great Mercy orphanage. We were the first volunteers who loved Jesus like them. They became family for me, and several were healed while I was there. L’viv, Ukraine might look pretty much the same, but I know that my time at the Blessings’ was a time of really great significance. The family I became a part of in Malaysia is different because of my time there. Even in the slow months, even in the hard months, I see good fruit from what I did this year. I guess coming home, I was overwhelmed by the perceived reality that life continues without me. I was keenly aware about how okay everyone was in my absence. That seems sad, but is also really freeing. I know that where ever I go, I bless and encourage people; knowing that they do well without me frees me to do that even more! I am choosing to look at the significance of my presence in the places I was called instead of the insignificance of my absence in the places I left behind. Does the fact that the name Heidi Baker means nothing to a bunch of kids in Lichinga, Mozambique affect the significance of her ministry? No! It is in the people who do know her name and thank Jesus that they have, because of the way that she loved them and blessed them. I want that. I don’t care if people remember my name or not, but if they do, I want them to be thankful that they met me and changed by the way I love Jesus.
So here is to starting an amazing new adventure and to doing it well. This next year will be incredible. I will be an agent of change and a bringer of Kingdom in whatever places my Daddy takes me this year. I will find significance in the small things and joy in the hard things, and I will see the Earth more and more filled with the knowledge of the Glory of God as waters fill the sea!
In Christ,
Caleb
PS: In the light of this new beginning, I am officially retiring my World Race blog with this post. I am in the process of launching my new website (blog, design portfolio, and ministry dreams/realities). I have already moved all of my old posts from this site over, and will continue to write from that platform. I still plan to share (retrospectively) my experiences from Malaysia and Cambodia, months 10 and 11, with you, and will post those here, but this will be my last post otherwise. If you would like to check out my website, I would love you forever. Feel free to visit http://www.calebdurham.com/blog/story/the_significance_of_a_year and comment and share it. More to come about the site launch coming soon! Please have patience with me as I figure this out. 🙂
