It wasn’t a bolt of lightning or a thunderous voice that said, “AND YOU SHALL GO FORTH AND…” That would have been nice and very easy to follow, but sometimes the calling can be quiet and still where you have to strain your ears to hear. It was a small stirring in my heart every time I heard a missionary talk about how God had worked through them and around them on the mission field. In church or in Chapel at Northwestern whenever someone spoke on Missions my heart would start pounding and I would think to myself, “I was made to do that!” It was small things throughout my life, small steps sometimes taken years apart that brought me to this place and The World Race.
I was looking through a newsletter from a college that I did not even attend when I saw an article about a student who had just returned from a year with Adventures in Missions in something called the World Race. My heat started pounding again. I had just graduated from MSU and had dedicated this next year entirely to God’s will. After longing to go on missions for as long as I could remember I finally had a chance. I could hardly contain myself at the possibility of being able to participate in something so big, so amazing.
But then the fear started to seep in with the reality of it. It took weeks for me to get the guts to even apply for the Race and even longer for me to complete the application and send it in. My life has been so comfortable for so long and my relationship with Jesus was becoming almost a routine. I knew that this was something that I needed to do, but I was so scared that I nearly backed out. But then one night as I was praying I felt God so close to me and I knew that we would be in this together and that He would even go before me in this journey.
When I am in sync with God I feel at complete peace, but when I begin to look at the challenges ahead and start to wonder how I will be able to do all of this the fear creeps in again until I finally realize that I can’t do this alone. But I am not alone. This process has already stretched me and has forced me to break through many fears and insecurities. So it is with a still small voice and a pounding heart that I take my Savior’s hand and take this next step.
“For I can do anything through Christ who strengthens me.” Philippians 4:13
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous; do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9
