Like I said in the About Me section of my blog, I was born in North Carolina and moved to Florida when I was three years old. We started attending Dunns Creek Baptist Church where my dad worked. I remember being outside playing soccer, and I was pretend setting up a field. I had a pretend spray paint bottle in my hand and was painting lines when all of a sudden, a thought was placed in my head. “You need to follow Jesus.” I ran straight to Mom who was watching me play and told her that I wanted to follow Jesus. That is all I remember. It was simple and sincere. Mom tells me now that I’m older that we prayed and we had a conversation about following Jesus that day, but I can’t remember any of that.
Years later, since I had always grown up in a Christian home, I doubted whether or not that I really meant that prayer when I was three years old. I repeatedly re-committed my life to Christ and asked Him into my heart over and over. It took years for me to realize that it wasn’t a prayer that saved me. I had to look at the Bible and see that nobody in the Old Testament prayed a prayer to ask Jesus to come into their heart, but they still followed God. Abraham is the example I like to use. Abraham was living his life and all of a sudden God calls him to take everything he owns and go to a place but God won’t tell him where. That is major obedience and a bold trust in God. It clicked when I realized that it wasn’t a prayer I prayed but a decision I made that saved me, just like Abraham decided to listen and follow God’s voice.
The verse that helped me overcome doubting my salvation is John 14:2. “In My Father’s house are many rooms, if it were not so I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you.” I will never forget that verse and still call it to my mind whenever I feel like I am doubting my salvation. As I’ve grown older, I’ve also realized that whenever I begin to doubt my salvation, it is actually God trying to speak to me and correct my path in life. The Holy Spirit is so awesome because He convicts us of sin and brings it to light so that we can expel it from our lives.
I am not perfect, but because of God’s grace and mercy, I can be seen as perfect through the lens of Jesus Christ. My life testimony is not finished. I’m constantly failing to live up to Jesus’ perfect example, but I am also constantly striving to learn more about, and follow, God. I thank God for His son and that he died for me and because of that I can have eternal life.
I now know that my three-year-old self was sincere because God told me that was the time I committed to Him. My mom told me that she prayed that the first time I heard God’s voice I would answer and not look back. It is super cool to know that God answered that prayer and He took a strong hold of my life at such a young age.
