Where are you at?
There are two men in my life.
One is Gentle and Kind.
The other is Charming and Entertaining.
One is beautiful.
The other is Attractive.
I enjoy both of them.
I sometimes find them arguing about me.
They both want my time and my love.
But I don’t think it’s possible to love them both.
The choice from the outside is obvious.
One is loving.
The other is Manipulative.
One likes to hold my hand and walk.
The other prefers to drag me around.
One tells me I’m beautiful.
The other whispers about how I could be beautiful.
One is intimate and enjoys teaching me things.
The other tells me lies.
When I’m with one he challenges and encourages me.
With the other we argue and he tears me down.
I want to want the gentle one.
But I find myself getting bored with safety.
I do not know how to be in a functional relationship.
I find myself searching for friction.
Searching for that argumentative side that just isn’t there.
Healthy isn’t easy.
Walking with God isn’t effortless.
But I know that I won’t get anywhere with the other.
So here I am.
Ready.
Ready to explore what healthy looks like.
