Well let’s just say she would probably just sigh and say,
“Oh, Brittany…I had a feeling something like this would happen…”
Let me start by describing exactly what she would be looking at…I got my nose pierced three months ago in Ireland, this past month in Malawi I changed it from a stud to a ring; I haven’t shaved my legs since the Awakening in Ireland; I, along with my team leader, am not shaving my armpits until final debrief in Thailand (it’s been a month…most of the guys are grossed out); I am also doing something a little bit different with my hair…as of this past month in Malawi I am in the beginning stages of dreadlocks; I also don’t remember the last time I wore make-up…I also am functioning with one-fourth of the clothes I originally came with which means they don’t always match and sometimes they just don’t make sense!
Now if my mother (and most other Americans) isn’t quite repulsed by this visual picture, I know for sure that my sister is! Although it may seem like I am going for shock factor…I’m not. That’s not quite where I’m coming from…for the majority of my pre-teen and teenage years, I struggled with low self-image, thinking that I was ugly and unworthy. Yeah, I know, it is something that most people go through, I am not saying that I am in anyway different, just that I’m over it, it’s behind me. I define beauty in a different way. Frankly I have never felt more beautiful in my entire life…I know that now that I have effectively removed all the obvious outward expressions of beauty that the world dictates or desires. When people see me, they see Christ in me. My beauty is found in God and God alone. Like Jesus’ description in Isaiah 53, “he had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him” I desire to look like Christ, I want that it’s the light of Christ that shines the most brightly.
My beauty, my value, my worth…is found in Christ, not in the latest Abercrombie jeans.
I say this not necessarily on a soapbox, not in a tone of conviction, but from freedom. Sure, now I look more like a World Racer than I did before and I don’t stand out horribly like I might at home…regardless, I am free. Free from the chains that used to bind me, free from the lies that if only I were thinner, taller, more beautiful, sexier…then things would be easier, more fun, satisfying, fulfilling. But that’s what they were, lies! The truth that Christ has spoken over me is that I am worthy, I am loved and I am free. I was bought by the blood of the Lamb and I am no longer a slave to sin or the Prince of Lies.
This year has been and continues to be an exercise in God’s love. Living in God’s love, loving with God’s love, experiencing God’s love, sharing God’s love, talking about God’s love, relying on God’s love, it’s God’s love that has brought me here, to this place (physical and metaphysical). And because of his love I can’t wait to go to Swaziland and (verb) LOVE the people who have been left for dead, ignored and neglected. First and greatest commandment is to Love the LORD, your God with all of your heart, mind and soul…second is to go and love others, Jesus said it…go do it…love is sacrifice. Love is counter-intuitive. It doesn’t make sense, who really wants to be vulnerable, to open themselves up for rejection, to do what the world tells you is wrong or stupid. Christ died for love. He loved us so much that he, being perfect (without sin) took on the sins of the WHOLE WORLD. Everything, he took on everything! That doesn’t make sense! Why would anyone sacrifice himself for someone who had wronged them?! LOVE!
“Be imitators of God, therefore, as dearly loved children and live a life of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.” – Ephesians 5:1-2.
