So here I am,
Sitting in the most amazing and beautiful country I have ever seen…
Surrounded by so many alumni, staff, and current racers on the field to build each other up, inspire each other, worship together, and just tell each other everything is going to be okay.
It feels so weird! When I look around me I see so many familiar faces because I have watched so many WR videos and read so many blogs and now… I’m getting to pray with, for, and alongside the SAME people I once wished I could be like! How cool is that right? God is pretty awesome isn’t he?
Something that I have been dealing with that is finely coming to the surface full force is God’s love and how to receive it. Also how to love others like he loves me. I thought I was doing that but this week it’s been blown up in my face that I haven’t been loving at all. Because in order to truly love, you have to TRUST. And that my friends is very hard for me to do.
Trusting God has been a crazy journey and just the other day a racer was asking me has God ever let you down? How can you not trust him?!?! But my response was just honest in saying that I have never relied on him for anything so I have no idea if he would pull through for me! I know that seems insane but it’s true!
But fact is, I’m working on it! I know god has some major plans for my life and I have to trust that!
Here is the fact….
If I don’t raise another $6,000 by the end of this month… I WILL BE SENT HOME.
It’s be a process but I can honestly say that I FULLY trust God in this matter now. It’s been a hard journey full of tears, bruises, shaking, jumping, screaming, laughing, and praying… Oh and that’s only been in the past 24 hours.
The awakening has been the most amazing experience of my life…I’m not sleeping, I don’t care if I eat a lot… I just want to WORSHIP MY GOD!
I spent last night jumping in freedom for about an hour! Screaming, shaking my dreads, crying, seeing my life flash before my eyes and remembering times when I thought God had left me….
Fact is, he never did. He was always there… When I didn’t feel God, those were the times I was pushing him away. So It’s my own fault.
But luckily, we serve a God of grace an mercy… And I’ve finely learned how to survive and be loved.
I don’t know what my journey holds… All I know is from now on, I am choosing to listen to God’s voice first and not push him away but embrace him as tightly as I can!
Lots of Love from Ireland!
Britt
