There are a lot of things I want to say in this blog I’m not sure that I’ve gathered my thoughts completely so we’ll see how this goes.
The world race seems to be some sort of huge preparation for marriage in more ways then I could tell you. (don’t get me wrong this is not mission find your spouse……bare with me I think it will make sense in the end) We live as a community together. ALL THE TIME. The good, the bad, the ugly. We get to see it all. Within our squad but more importantly in our small teams of 6 or 7. seriously. I don’t know really how to stress the point of seeing it all. Crying ,laughing ,frustration, every sort of mood or attitude we possess. This year we get to learn so much about ourselves and our real desires. More importantly G-ds desires for us. We get to learn how to react in tense situations as well as happy moments in ways that are healthy and good. We also see how the other gender thinks and process things. I’ve learned many things so far this year and its only been 4 months. I know what I want in life and what G-d has for me is so much bigger then I could have ever dreamed up. I know what is set in front of me. I know what I need to continue doing and what areas I need to step up in.
In the future I would like to be a part of a marriage that is loving, caring, fun, but most of all one that glorifies G-d. He has been teaching me a lot about what exactly that means. And I finally think I see the big picture. (ha) A marriage has to be G-d centered. As much as I’ve heard that my entire life I never quite got it. Growing up in a divorced home and then my Dad getting remarried and then later divorced again didn’t quite set the right tone for me. I didn’t see a marriage ever quite working out the way I think it was intended to. So I sort of just had the thought of marriage in the VERY back of my mind. Until now. I see the married couples on the race and I am encouraged by them. Happy, loving, fun, and cheesy as it sounds G-d fearing. I see that it can be a huge blessing. You can still be your own person, be involved in ministries as if they aren’t a chore or obligation. The couples that have been part of my example have set a completely new tone for me. I see it. What is really supposed to be. Healthy, clean, and sincere.
I have been thinking so much on marriage lately (with no one in mind…just an in general thought). In the future I would like to be part of a marriage that can be a source of encouragement for my siblings Kayleigh (19), Trey (14), and Garrett (10). I want them to be able to see that it is possible. That a marriage is a good thing. A source of joy, blessings, and patience. I would more than anything love to give that to them.
It is so sad that the world has corrupted such an amazing thing. I’ve also heard that a lot in my life as well as experienced it personally. It’s like you can just get married if it doesn’t work out no biggie. The thing that started this whole blog was a couple of lyrics from JOHN MAYER home life:
I can tell you this much
I will marry just once
And if it doesn’t work out
Give her half of my stuff
It’s fine with me
We said eternity
My initial thoughts on the song were aw that’s cute he said he’d marry just once ……we said eternity. Then its those in-between the lines things if it doesn’t work out I’ll give her half of my stuff. Its sad that its so common that people get divorced and split up the stuff then its over no problem. That shouldn’t be. It makes me want to show the world starting with my family and friends that marriage is a serious thing. I think it’s a gift from G-d. The person He has made specifically for you is there. You do not have to do anything but follow G-d’s will and he will figure the rest out. The person that is made for you is out there seeking him to the fullest. No need to daydream or problem solve your way in and out of relationships that are not of Him. I guess what I am trying to say is that we need to focus on the here and now of the plan. Moving forward in what He has for us. Along with making sure you are fully trusting that He is putting the desires that He wants us to have in our hearts. So for me it’s a marriage to a man who loves and follows G-d. A man that loves me for who I am. That can encourage me in my spiritual walk.
I will no longer waste my thoughts or my heart on another boy that does not have the intentions of being that man of G-d I know I deserve and have been promised.
that’s my heart right now. I hope it makes sense.
