A letter from a special friend who was with me from beginning till the end. This was not the best year of my life, neither was it the best chapter of my life. The book is just a few chapters in. And though the book has been intense and very interesting this is just to keep you on your toes for what is to come. God’s plan for my life is wrecking me, a sinner from a small East Texas town, a country girl who has been blessed to be able to spread his great love not only in USA but all over this world. I will continue this journey but for now this is it. The last VLOG coming soon. Trying to get together the best of what last year was is HARD to do in such a short amount of time without taking up all your attention span. I’ll try and make it less than and hour ;). Love all of you and THANK you for prayers and support that reached people all over the world. Every comment, penny and prayer never went unnoticed. It ain’t over.
-B
August 8th, 2017- June 21st, 2018
I am writing this as a witness and testimony to the transformation I have seen in Ms. Brittani Dannette Toole over the course of these last eleven months.
To all of you back home, I want to make it clear that the Brittani who left Whitehouse, Texas last August is not the same woman returning to you now.
When I first met Brittani, I didn’t want to admit the intimidation I felt by her strong and confident personality. Clearly she had a natural gift for leading and connecting with people. She had a background in theology, and years of classroom management and teaching skills under her belt. Nothing I could do or say would make this woman trust me, it would be up to her.
And so we began our journey together.
Over the year I watched as God took a woman hardened by past hurts and disappointments and began to soften her with His constant love and affection. I watched as a woman convinced she couldn’t go “deeper” with people, shared her most difficult struggles and weakest moments with her new team. I watched as a gifted evangelist, passionate about showing others the love of Jesus, was wooed by her personal savior into understanding His deep, unending love for her.
Over the year God took a woman, bearing the weight of the armor she had created for self protection, and shattered her.
The lies of shame, shattered.
The lies of brokenness… shattered.
Guilt and punishment, shattered.
The thoughts of mistrust, anger, and fear, SHATTERED.
Piece by piece, He shattered her.
And then,
I watched as He took those shattered pieces,
and
RESTORED HER.
Made her new.
I watched as He humbled her in earning the trust and respect of others, rather than demanding it. I marveled as He used someone uncomfortable with intense feelings, to bring comfort, safety, and soothing love to many aching hearts. I noticed her choosing to stay and invest, when everything she felt told her to run. I saw her strengthened by vulnerability, using it to usher in community and bring others into the Kingdom Family for all eternity.
I have seen Brittani walk through battlefields of demons and lost souls, standing tall in the knowledge that she holds an untouchable authority given to her by Jesus Christ Himself. I have seen her fighting for her family and friends back home, her family and friends beside her, and for those she has counted as family without ever knowing their name. I have seen her choosing to step into places of darkness and despair in order to bring the truth of salvation to those confused by the world and drowning in deception.
Brittani now understands that God’s strength is made perfect in her weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9), and that He walks with her even when it feels like she’s alone (Deuteronomy 31:6). God has led Brittani through brokenness, healing, vulnerability, humility, strength, and true leadership.
So, who exactly is this new creation coming home to you after all this time?
She is a shining reflection of Jesus. Someone who serves quietly, without asking for anything in return. Someone who loves authentically and pursues relentlessly. She is someone who leads others by her own example into a place of beautiful vulnerability. She is the first to go when it’s tough, and the last to follow when it’s easy. She is someone who chooses to stay and fight when it gets hard, to assume the best, and to obey the Lord wherever He leads and in whatever He asks.
With faith like a child, excitement like a newlywed, and strength like a warrior; she fights for others to know who they are in Christ, seeks the Lord’s’ will above all else, and embraces the muck and mess of life in order to glorify God in all that she does. She is a woman transformed by the freedom and love offered by a good, good Father. Motivated to see others grow and change by the same freedom and love offered to them by her personal Savior. A woman no longer defined by her past or the approval of others, she is willing to risk hurt and rejection, boldly declaring her mistakes and how God has used them to anyone she comes in contact with.
Brittani is a woman who is virtuous in character, pure of heart, and overflowing with kindness, gentleness, and joy. She is defined by her faithfulness, her loyalty, her humility and the love she carries for people that is so unlike anything of this world it can only be described as JESUS.
Knowing what I now know about Brittani, if i could return to the moment I first met her I would tell myself with a smile, “your life has just been forever changed for the better.”
I have seen the Lord use Brittani to speak words of truth and exhortation to her squad, bring others into the Kingdom of Heaven, and change the atmosphere around her to one where Holy Spirit is freely moving. The fire she has walked through this year has sharpened her and prepared her for the battle “not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms…” (Ephesians 6:12). The Lord has created within Brittani a ferocious warrior, armed with His truth and grace, knowledge of her identity and freedom found in Him, and a fearless love that will usher in countless of new victors through the gates of eternal life with their savior forever.
Brittani left as a woman, shaped by the hurt and lies of this world not meant for her to carry.
She returns to you now, a redeemed daughter of the Most High King, armed and ready for a battle made victorious by her personal Father, the Lord Jesus Christ.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17)
I hereby testify and believe that the facts listed in this personal statement are true,
Emily Jane Spencer
June 25th, 2018
