God has given me a gift. A gift that not everyone has.
A gift that I am very thankful for.
How does that quote go from Spiderman? “With great power comes great responsibility”.
I believe that if we were to say : “With great talents, comes great responsibility”…it would mean just as much. Because it’s true.
What initially drew me into the race was actually their Instagram hashtag “#11n11”. When I first began my research, I wanted to see what life in the field was like for a racer. I probably spent 3 hours on instagram, admiring picture after picture of what these people were doing on their race. And I became hooked.
As I sat there, on my blow up mattress, in my apartment with my dog by my side…a seed was planted. A seed that would eventually grow into a weed that would cloud my mind and ruin the gift the Lord had given me. The next morning I eyed my camera every few minutes…dreaming to be one of the photographers I saw the night before. The photographers that the World Race recognized. The Photographers that gained many followers…and even more likes.
Pride took hold of my life…and tried to swallow one of the most precious gifts the Lord gave me.
It started right away.
As soon as I left for my Race, my mind was consumed with what others would think of my pictures…and what they would want to see, not necessarily what I would want to remember. Soon my time with children became a tool for verbal affirmation and social recognition. I’d get emails saying that the world race had retweeted my tweets…that they had retweeted my Instagram photos. This seed that started so small…that was left unattended grew into a madness. A sickness. A disease that I still fight today.
Slowly the Lord began pulling me back. I would like to say that the Lord brought me through something tragic to get my attention, but honestly it was someones feedback that made me realize just how gone I was.
She told me to imagine my life without Instagram.
Was it painful?
And honestly, it was…
Awkward…right?
It would pain me to delete an app on my phone.
It would pain me to lose that recognition.
So then I prayed about how to be a photographer…a photographer that honored the Lord.
So for the past few months, I’ve made it a ministry rather than use it for some selfish desire for everyone to notice me. One of the most beautiful moments on my race is when someone pulled me aside and said : “I’ve really noticed lately how much you’ve grown in your photography…even since the beginning of the race. Not that you were bad in the beginning…but you can just see how you use your camera to serve the people on this squad. It’s beautiful.”
I could have cried. Thank GOD that He reeled me back in when I was neck deep in my own pride. I’ve gotten so much joy out of taking pictures to serve my squad and not to gain attention. It’s been so amazing to see how the Lord is blessing me and my gifts in ways that FURTHER His Kingdom instead of using pictures to boost my notifications. I've often left my camera behind at our "home" and really soaked up what the Lord wanted me to see through the lenses of my own eyes. Guys, seriously, the most incredible things I've seen on the race were the days I left my camera behind. It's also been awesome to let other people take the pictures, and to come along side them and learn from and encourage each other.
If you’re a lover of all things photography…and see the "World Race Greats” and want to be one of them…don’t. God has given you a gift. A gift that not a lot of people have. Pack your camera gear and leave your ego at home. Only when you drop the lens of pride do you really begin to see the world you’re traveling and the people you are serving.
Some people suggest leaving your camera at home for the race. I’ve talked to many of those people mid race and they regret it. And I have heard that some people sent their cameras home. Whatever you decide, don’t forget that you are a great photographer. You don’t need Facebook likes, Instagram followers, or the World Race to feature your photos to be "great". Let all of the pictures you take have meaning. And don’t for a second think that you’re not good enough or that you would be if “x” happened.
Love the gift you’ve been given.
Run the race embracing your gift.
And I promise that it will show in your pictures.
Shout out to Kristen and Ashley on my squad, both of which have been teammates and have taken my favorite pictures of myself thus far on the race. You guys are baller and I'm so privileged to be walking this journey with you girls. Everyone go check out their blogs and admire their work! It's beautiful! Also, shout out to MK Hill, Jonathan Garner, and Johnfrank Dieguez for using your gifts humbly and for the Lord! And for inadvertently helping me take the leap to apply for the race! Praying the Lord brings so many blessings through your gifts! Check out their stuff too! You won't regret it!
